At The Beginning
by pukaroxliza
Summary: Susan Pevensie finds herself in Narnia after six months, but everything has changed. Why are there Telmarines in Narnia? Who is Prince Caspian? And where in the world are Peter, Edmund and Lucy? COMPLETE!
1. Starting Out On A Journey

**A/N I obviously do not own any of these characters, only the plot. **

**This story is set between the Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe and Prince Caspian. The story doesn't relate in any way to the rest of the series, only the Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe. Also the character description matches the characters in the movies.**

**And yes, the title of this story and the titles of the chapters are lyrics from the song At the Beginning from the movie Anastasia. I also don't own this.**

**At the Beginning**

**Starting Out on a Journey**

Susan Pevensie sat alone in her house, sipping her tea and reading a newspaper that her older brother Peter had brought in earlier that morning. She often found that reading the newspaper distracted her from thinking of Narnia and any chance of ever going back, so she read the newspaper every day, at least twice a day.

It was a bit of a nasty day out, considering it was only October. Snow flurries flew around outside the window, and Susan wondered what in the world her younger siblings could be doing outside on a day like this. She knew that Peter would be at his friend Jacob's house, but Lucy and Edmund would probably be outside, even though it was freezing. She felt like screaming at them to come inside, but then realized that she truly couldn't be bothered. She continued to read the newspaper, when she suddenly heard a strange noise. It sounded familiar, but she couldn't exactly place it. She ignored it, looking down at her paper. There was a large picture of a medieval style castle with giant flags blowing in the wind; a tall wall surrounding what she guessed would be a city that the castle looked over.

Wait a second.

She looked at the flags again, and noticed that they were actually blowing in the wind, flapping around violently. She looked at the entrance to the city and saw a cart pulled by a donkey slowly moving out of sight. She put the paper closer to her face, and felt a strange tug in the pit of her stomach. She closed her eyes, and when she opened them again she found herself staring at the castle, except it looked much larger now, and there was colour in the flags. She looked around her, and saw that her house had completely disappeared. Instead she was sitting on a large stone pathway that led into the city. She stood up, wondering what in the world had just happened. She started to make her way into the city. It was built like an old medieval city, the same as the castle, and all of the inhabitants were dressed as though they lived in the 1600's. She felt out of place in her school uniform, and lots of people seemed to be staring at her. One person whispered something into their neighbour's ear, and the neighbour ran away. Susan wondered if maybe she had done something wrong, maybe this was a strictly male city. No, there were woman walking around too. She wandered around aimlessly for what she guessed must have been at least half an hour. During that time she decided that she must be in Narnia, there was no other explanation. But why had she come? And where were her siblings? And where exactly in Narnia was she?

An older man riding a horse came galloping towards her, and when he reached her he dismounted and bowed. Susan felt flattered; it had been a while since anybody had bowed down to her.

"Queen Susan?" asked the old man. She nodded, "But where are the rest?"

"I do not know" she said, "May I ask who you are?"

"Oh yes! I am Doctor Cornelius, tutor to prince Caspian"

"Caspian? I have never heard the name… Where am I?"

"You are in Narnia of course"

"Yes, but I mean… where in Narnia?"

"Oh, I would tell you but you would now know how to pronounce the name. Come now my queen, we must get you back to the castle. Caspian has been expecting you"  
Susan mounted the horse with the old man's help and they made their way towards the giant castle. Susan was amazed at how beautiful it looked up close. They rode through the gates of the castle, and the Doctor helped Susan off the horse when they reached the gardens.

"Continue down this path your majesty, you will find the prince at the end. I will join you shortly"

Susan didn't know what to expect as she walked through the gardens of the castle, following the path that the Doctor had indicated to her, but it certainly wasn't what she saw. At the end of the path was a young man, probably only eighteen, with long black hair and tanned skin, swinging a sword against a straw dummy. Susan was impressed by his skill, but Edmund was still the best swordsman she had ever seen. She watched in silence, afraid of breaking his concentration, until he noticed her. He wiped some sweat of his brow as he faced her.

"Hello" he said. She was surprised by how colloquially he greeted her. She smiled shyly.

"Hello"

"Are you… searching for someone?"

"Depends" she said.

"On what?"

"On whether or not you are prince Caspian"

"I am" he said.

"Then I am not searching for someone" she said, bowing before him.

"What brings you here, stranger?' he asked.

"I do not know… but I was told by the Doctor to follow this path and I would find you. Apparently you have been expecting me"

"Expecting you? Well, I am expecting four kings and queens, and since you are only one peasant dressed rather oddly… no, you must be mistaken"

"I am not a peasant. Well, in England perhaps, but in Narnia I am Queen Susan, the Gentle" she said, sounding angry, even though she really wasn't.

Caspian dropped his sword, his eyes wide. In an instant he was on his knees, his head bowed.

"I beg for your forgiveness your highness. I did not mean to offend"

Susan giggled, and Caspian looked up at her, confused.

"I wasn't offended" she smiled and brushed a strand of hair out from in front of her face, "I was only joking. But I am Queen Susan, though you may call me Susan"

Caspian stood up, and gave her a crooked smile, then a confused look.

"But if you are Queen Susan… where are the rest of the Kings and Queens of old?" he asked, "I was told the horn would summon all of you"

"The horn!" she said, snapping her fingers, "That was what I heard!" then she looked at him apologetically, "I'm afraid though your highness that I do not know where Peter, Edmund and Lucy are. I do not doubt that they are in Narnia, they must have just appeared somewhere else"

"No need for formalities" he replied, smiling, "If I am to call you Susan then you are to call me Caspian"

"Why did you summon us?" she asked. Caspian sighed.

"I am in need of help, more specifically the help of somebody who lived in the days of old Narnia"

"The days of old Narnia?" asked Susan, "Why my siblings and I only left Narnia less than six months ago"

"Where you come from, perhaps, but in Narnia it has been over thirteen hundred years. This is why I need your help. I am in need of refuge. My aunt is pregnant, and it would not surprise me if she gave birth to a son. I have heard the stories of old Narnia, and am hoping that the Narnians will provide me with the refuge that I seek"

"I am sure they will" said Susan, "But why do you need our help?"

"Well, as you can see, I am a Telmarine, and the Narnians are not too fond of us. I was hoping that if I was accompanied by the Kings and Queens of Old they would grow to trust me"

"You are a Telmarine? What are you doing in Narnia?" she asked. When her and her siblings had lived in Narnia there were no Telmarines in Narnia, only in their homeland, Telmar.

"It is a long story" he said, giving her another crooked smile.

"I see the two of you have become acquainted" said the Doctor, walking towards them.

"Cornelius, are the horses ready?" asked Caspian. The Doctor nodded.

"Yes my prince, they are ready to leave when you are"

"Then we have no time to waste" he said, then he turned to Susan, "I expect you will be joining us?"

"Joining you? Where are you going?"

"In search of the Narnians of course" he said, as if it should be obvious.

"Well I suppose I should, since my accompanying you in your search for Narnians is the reason you called me" she said. Caspian nodded and guided her and his tutor towards the stables. Caspian mounted a black stallion while the Doctor chose the same horse from earlier. Susan got on the last available horse, a beautiful brown horse with wild eyes. She stroked it's mane before the three of them set off. As they rode in silence, a thousand questions formed in Susan's mind. Why had Caspian truly call her and her brothers and sister? She didn't believe that it was simply because he wanted to gain the trust of the Narnians so he could become a refugee among them. Why were the Telmarines in Narnia? Why were the Narnians in hiding? Why did the horses not talk? Where exactly had Peter, Edmund and Lucy turned up? She hoped to find the answers to these questions soon, as well as her siblings. This new Narnia was so unfamiliar to her that it felt as if this were her first time in Narnia. Finally, after what seemed like hours of riding at a fast pace, Caspian's horse slowed down. Susan hadn't really been paying attention as to where they were, and was surprise to find herself in a large forest. She slowed her horse down too, until all three horses came to a complete stop.

"We will rest here for the night" announced Caspian. Susan admired the young man. He was so young, and yet he was obviously born to be a leader. Susan dismounted her horse and tied it to a tree. The Doctor and Caspian did the same, and Caspian started searching for some sticks and branches to make a fire.

"Would you like some help?" asked Susan, and Caspian shrugged, so Susan decided to begin searching. Soon she found several branches large enough to make a fire and she brought them to the where Caspian had begun to deposit all of the sticks and branches that he found. He noticed the amount she had brought, and looked at her impressed.

"Where did you find these? They are the perfect wood for fire…"

"Because the tree they come from is naturally dry. I found them by the tree that they had fallen from. You must remember that I have lived in Narnia longer than you have"

He nodded, still impressed, and started to make the fire.

"May I ask why we need a fire?" she asked, "It is a warm day, and it doesn't cool of too much at night"

"We need a fire for two reasons," said Caspian, not looking up from his work, "Because we need to cook the meat that I asked Cornelius to pack, and because a good story is told better around a fire"

"A story?"

"Two actually" he said, "I will be telling you about how the Telmarines came to Narnia and basically everything that has happened when you were away, and you will be telling me the story of what happened when you resided in Narnia"

"Sounds like a deal" she said, smiling and Caspian dedicated a third crooked smile to her.


	2. Here We Are

**Here We Are**

Susan woke up after a rather rough sleep. It took her a few seconds to remember where she was, but seeing Caspian and the Doctor sleeping next to her jogged her memory. She blushed when she caught herself staring at Caspian, noticing all of the things about him that she hadn't noticed the day before. Like how long his eyelashes were, or how the skin on his face was slightly tanner than the skin on his hands. She stood up, and tried in vain to flatten the wrinkles out her shirt and skirt. She realized she was still wearing the tie her school forced her to wear and she untied it, leaving it draped over her shoulders, having no where else to put it. She sat down beside the horse she had ridden the day before and thought about what Caspian had told her the previous night. The Telmarines had invaded Narnia. Cair Paravel had fallen. The Narnians that had survived had been forced into hiding, the Telmarines now unaware that there were still Narnians out there. She couldn't believe how much had changed since her and her siblings left. And Aslan… She had been told that Aslan hadn't made an appearance since he had left after they had been crowned. She wondered where he had ended up, but that thought was overridden by her wondering where Peter, Edmund and Lucy had ended up. She was now certain that they must be in Narnia as well, but she was confused as to why they had not all appeared in the same place. She wished she could stop thinking about her brothers and sister but she was honestly worried, especially about Lucy. If all four of them had appeared in different places, what would Lucy do all alone if she had appeared in the middle of the forest, or in a Telmarine village? She started to grab tufts of grass and throw them behind her, a habit she had when she was worried and outside.

"Something on your mind?" she heard Caspian as he sat down beside her. She hadn't even noticed him getting up. She blushed when he sat down closer than she thought he would, and was a bit annoyed when she noticed that his clothes were completely wrinkle free. Narnian clothing must have some kind of anti-wrinkle magic in them. She sighed loudly.

"I was just hoping that I was the only one of my siblings that appeared alone or at least that somebody is with Lucy. She would be so lost alone"

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but wasn't she known as Queen Lucy the Brave?" he asked and she pulled her knees close to her chest.

"Yes, that was what she was known as, but I am still worried"

"Do not worry, she will be okay. Was she with one of your brothers when I blew the horn?"

"Yes, Edmund and her were playing outside together"

"Then I believe she will not be alone, for Edmund must have appeared with her" he said, putting an arm around her shoulder reassuringly.

"Caspian" she said, shivers running down her spine after using his name for the first time, "What is the real reason that you blew the horn?"

He chuckled.

"You saw through my lie then?" he asked, and she nodded.

"The truth is that I do not seek refuge" he said, looking off into the distance, "Cornelius is half dwarf, something I did not know until several days ago. I have always been fascinated by the stories of old Narnia, but was not aware that there were still Narnians out there," he paused for a second and then took a deep breath, "I am getting quite tired of Miraz's way of running the kingdom, and I know that as soon as his wife gives him a son that he will become the next in line for the throne, for I will be eliminated from the picture; I am sure of this. So I plan to claim my kingdom the only way possible, by declaring war on them. I am aware that no Telmarine would dare show their disloyalty to Miraz, but I know that the Narnians will have no problem fighting for their land, for as soon as I win my kingdom back I plan on giving the Narnians back their land"

"You are very brave" said Susan, understanding his need for calling them now, "I am sorry that I am not much help, the only useful talent I has is shooting arrows, and I left my bow and arrow on my horse before I went back"

"You are just the amount of help that I need. And I promise that I will find your bow and arrows for you" he said, squeezing her shoulder. It was then that Susan realized that he hadn't removed his arm from her shoulder, and she felt her heart beat faster.

"Do not worry about that. I'm sure that they are long gone anyway" she said, blushing, her hair falling in front of her face. He tucked the hair behind her ear.

"How old are you Susan?" he asked, and Susan felt the same shivers she had felt when she had said his name.

"Where did that come from?" she asked, blushing.

"I just want to know" he said, shrugging. She laughed.

"I will tell you if you promise to tell me your age after"

"Deal"

"Alright, well do you want to know my Narnian age or my actual age?"

"Both" he said, smiling.

"Well, in England I am fifteen, but in Narnia I am over thirteen hundred years old"

"You've aged very well" he said and she laughed.

"Prince, Queen" said the Doctor, standing in front of them, "Are you ready to leave?"

"Please Doctor, call me Susan. When you call me Queen I feel like I am Caspian's mother"

"How is that possible, you are younger than me!" he said, and she raised an eyebrow.

"Are you fourteen hundred years old young man?" she asked.

"No, but I am eighteen, meaning that technically I am older than you" he grinned at her. She rolled her eyes.

"Fine, but I'm not happy about it"

"Well, now that that is cleared up, yes Cornelius, we are ready to leave" and then he whispered something in his tutor's ear, and he nodded.

"Where are we headed?" asked Susan, mounting her horse.

"It's a surprise" he said, giving her his crooked smile. She sighed and followed them through the forest till they emerged on the other side, where they rode by a beach for several hours.

"Cornelius" called Caspian suddenly, "We are making excellent time, don't you think?"

"Yes your majesty"

"So do you think we could risk giving our horses a bit of a rest and walking a bit of the length of this marvellous beach?" he asked, and the Doctor shrugged.

"I suppose so" he said, and the three of them dismounted their horses. Susan took her shoes off and held them in one hand and her horses' reigns in the other.

"What do you think of the beaches of Narnia?" asked Caspian.

"You keep forgetting that I have lived here longer than you have, and obviously have seen many Narnian beaches. But to answer your question, they are beautiful, much better than the beaches in England" she scanned the beach they were on currently, "Although this one does look vaguely familiar. Where are we?"

"You will find out soon enough" he said, and Susan sighed.

"Alright, but so many surprises in one day might just end up killing me" she said.

"There is only one surprise today" he said, and she smiled.

"Well that is better then"

"Tell me something about yourself Susan"

Susan felt the same shiver up her spine, and she wondered if she was doomed to feel that every time he called her by her name.

"What do you want to know?" she asked, closing her eyes, feeling the ocean breeze going through her hair.

"Anything"

"Well, my favourite colour is green" she said.

"Then why are you dressed in blue?"

"This is my school uniform" she said, pointing to her clothes. He looked confused, "Oh yes, I forgot that there are no school's in Narnia. Well, you know the things that your tutor teaches you?" she asked, and he nodded, "Well, in England and basically everywhere else in the world, they teach those things too, except that there are twenty to thirty people learning it at the same time. This is called a class. A school is many classes put together"

"And one tutor teaches twenty to thirty people?"

"Yes"

"How odd" he commented, and she giggled.

"Alright, now you need to tell me something about yourself"

"Like what?"

"Anything"

"Well, my favourite colour is red"

"Then why are you wearing brown?"

"I see what you are doing" he said, and she smirked, "Alright, your turn"

"I spend a lot of my time alone"

"So do I" he said, "Which is why I am enjoying spending time with you. I have never really met anybody my age before. I spend all my time in the castle see, and there are really no men my age"

"I am not a man your age" said Susan.

"But I still enjoy being with you" he replied, and she smiled.

"Thank you, I enjoy being with you too"

"Prince!" called the Doctor who had been walking ahead of them, "They are visible"

"What are visible?" she asked.

"The ruins" said Caspian, and Susan looked ahead and saw the castle, or what was left of what she suspected must have been a magnificent castle.

"We're going there?"

"Of course" he said, as if it should be obvious.

"Why?"

"Because I believe there is something buried within the Ruins that I want to show you"

"But you don't know for sure?"

"No"

"Brilliant"

They walked in silence for a while, but it wasn't awkward. Susan felt completely comfortable walking beside Caspian without saying a word, as though they had been doing it forever when in fact she had only met him the day before.

"What's at the Ruins?" she asked, breaking the silence. Caspian chuckled.

"Why do you insist on ruining your surprise?"

"I'm a curious person" she said, shrugging.

"I can tell" he said, laughing. She smiled.

"You have a beautiful laugh" she said, and then she felt the heat creep up to her face. She couldn't believe she had just said that. She glanced at him, and he was smiling crookedly at her, and observing her. She looked away, feeling her blush spreading through her whole face, her heart beating faster. Why did he have this effect on her? She glanced at him again. He was still observing her. She wondered if he had been observing her the entire time. She didn't know, she hadn't been watching him.

"What?" she asked. He looked into her eyes.

"Thank you" he said. She raised an eyebrow, confused.

"For what?"

"For telling me I have a beautiful laugh. It means a lot coming from someone who has so many beautiful features as you do"

She looked away, not wanting him to see her smile at his compliments.

"I was just telling you the truth" she said, tucking some hair behind her ear, although the breeze pulled it back out almost as soon as she put her hand down to the level of her hips.

"Well then I thank you for your honesty" he said, and she looked into his eyes. They were a beautiful shade of brown.

"Your majesty, we should ride the rest of the way" called the Doctor, and Caspian looked up as if he had just been in a trance.

"Yes, you are right" he said, mounting his horse. Susan followed suit and they picked up the pace, once again riding in silence. She glanced at the scenery around her as the horses climbed a rather steep hill, and found it all very familiar.

"Caspian, where are we?" she called.

"You don't know yet? I thought by now you would have figured it out" he said, chuckling.

"You could just tell me… it would save me a lot of trouble"

"No, I think I will let you find out on your own" he said as their horses jumped over the edge of the hill, landing a few feet away from the Ruins. Susan dismounted her horse and stared at the Ruins.

"Someone truly powerful must have lived here" she said.

"Someone beautiful lived here" said Caspian. Susan turned to him, confused.

"You know who lived here?"

"Of course" he said. Susan turned back to the Ruins, taking them in.

"There must have been a terrible battle here" she said, noticing how more than half the castle was missing. Caspian sighed.

"There was. This was one of the Telmarines main targets" he said, sounding disgusted in his own people.

"Then it must have been important" said Susan.

"It was"

"Can we get closer?" she asked. Caspian nodded.

"I actually have to look for that thing… why don't you look around. I'm sure that you will recognize it eventually" he said.

"I've been here before?" she asked, trying to remember castles she had visited while she lived in Narnia.

"Why do you think the whole scenery is so familiar to you?" asked Caspian, walking away from her, towards a large part of the castle that was still standing. She walked through the ruins of what she knew must have been a truly beautiful castle. The more she thought about it the more she realized that as a queen of Narnia she hadn't really visited any castles. In fact, the only castle she remembered was…

"Caspian!" she called. He appeared, looking at her with a concerned look on his face. She could the tears starting to well up in her eyes. One slipped down her cheek.

"You have recognized the castle?" he asked, and she nodded, sniffing.

"Cair Paravel" she mumbled, "Oh, it can't believe they did this to my home!" she said, and Caspian pulled her into a hug, stroking her hair.

"Here, I think I've found something that will make you feel better" he said and he took her hand, guiding her towards the large wall. She noticed a small door in the wall and she looked at him, and he nodded. They walked towards it and he pushed the door open and it fell of its hinges. He gave her a worried look and she just laughed. They were met with a winding staircase.

"Here we are" he said.

She let go of his hand and ran down the stairs, recognizing the room they had just stepped into. This was where they kept their most valuable possessions, like her horn and bow and arrows, or Peter's sword. She quickly made her way to her chest and opened it, expecting to find it empty, but all of her possessions were still in there, some in a better state then others. And there, on top of everything, was her bow and arrows. She slung them behind her back, feeling much less useless. She turned to look at Caspian. He was leaned against a pillar in the middle of the room, his arms crossed over his chest, a smug grin on his face.

"What?" she asked, trying but failing to stop herself from smiling.

"Do you like your surprise?" he asked. She sighed.

"It is the most wonderful, horrible surprise ever" she said, completely honestly.

"I knew it would be hard for you to see Cair Paravel" he admitted, and she shrugged.

"I think I needed to see it. I didn't truly believe that it was gone until now" she said, looking around the room. Something caught her eye. Lucy's chest was open. So was Edmunds. She gasped running towards them. The only thing left in Lucy's was a bunch of dresses and in Edmunds were some of his best clothes that he wore only on special occasions.

"My brother and sister… they've been here!" she exclaimed. Caspian chuckled.

"That explains the door" he said, and Susan laughed. She felt a surge of relief run through her. Lucy wasn't alone, Edmund was with her, and they were armed. And they must be close. The question was in which direction had they gone.

"We should continue" said Caspian and Susan nodded.

"Where exactly are we going?" she asked. Caspian shrugged.

"Well, I wanted to come here because I suspected that some Narnians might be hiding out in the woods around the castle of their Kings and Queens of Old"

"Or it's ruins" sighed Susan.

"Anyway, we will search the forest for a day or two, and then we will move on to the next forest"

"You suppose that the Narnians are hidden in a forest?" she asked.

"Either that or underground" he said, walking towards the exit of the room. Susan glanced at Peter's closed chest and ran over to it, opening it. All of his things were still there, including his sword. She glanced at Caspian's sword, swinging on his hip, and she wondered if Peter would be angry at her if she took his sword.

"Caspian" she called. He turned around almost instantly.

"Yes?"

"Do we have room for one more sword?" she asked, "It's just… if we find Peter I would love to have this returned to him"

"I'm sure we'll manage with one more weapon" he replied, and she grinned, picking up her brothers sword and running towards the exit of the room, ready to leave her old home. They both grimaced when they walked back into the sunlight.

"Cornelius!" called Caspian. The Doctor appeared by them in an instant.

"Yes prince?"

"We are ready to leave" he said, and the Doctor nodded. They followed him to the horses. Susan attached Peter's sword to the side of her horse, and mounted it, following Caspian and the Doctor towards the forest, giving the Ruins of Cair Paravel one last glance before leaving them behind her for good

**A/N yes, I am aware that Cair Paravel is located on an island, but that simply didn't fit with the story… sorry for changing the scenery a bit **


	3. Life is a Road

**Life is a Road**

Just as Caspian had said they wandered the forest for about two days, and then admitting that there was simply no sign of life at all they headed off towards the next forest. They rode in silence again, but Susan was itching to talk to Caspian. Over the past two days they had continued the friendship they had began to from the day they met, and even though they had only known each other for four days she would already easily consider him one of her best friends. They had talked about everything and nothing at the same time, getting to know each other by asking questions and explaining things the other didn't understand. Most of the time the Doctor simply listened in silence, every once in a while adding a sentence to the conversation. She was surprise by how easily she and Caspian could communicate. She normally couldn't talk to anyone except her siblings, and Caspian had admitted that the only person he seemed to ever hold a conversation with had been his tutor, until she had appeared.

She hadn't admitted it yet, but she had been quite disappointed when they hadn't found Edmund or Lucy in their search through the forest. She had been positive that they would have stayed in the forest where it was safe, unless they didn't know about the Telmarines and how Narnia was not the Narnia they remembered. At this thought she had become quite worried, but she tried not to let it show. She didn't want Caspian worrying about her worries, and she certainly didn't want to be worried by them. She thought that by simply ignoring them they would go away, but they didn't.

"Susan" called Caspian, sending the usual shiver down her spine, "What's on your mind?"

"Sorry?" she asked.

"You look like you're thinking about something. What is it?"

"How can you tell when I'm thinking about something?" she asked, curious. He smiled at her.

"You bite your lip and let out constant sighs" he said, and she felt a tickle in the pit of her stomach. He really had been observing her.

"Well, yes, I am thinking of something, but I do not want to bother you with it" she said.

"I am asking you to bother me with it" he said kindly. Susan sighed.

"Alright. I was just thinking about my younger siblings. They had obviously been through Cair Paravel, but we weren't able to find them while searching for Narnians in the forest" she said, "And I haven't seen a single sign of Peter even being here"

"We will find your brothers and sister" he said reassuringly.

"Caspian, do you have any siblings?" she asked, trying to keep the conversation going, even though she already knew the answer.

"No. My father died shortly after I turned three" he said bitterly, "I do not know what happened to my mother"

"That's terrible" she said, "I can't imagine what my life might be like without my mum and dad"

"I was alright, my aunt and uncle weren't always evil with me, in fact my aunt was often kind. But once she became pregnant I realized that Miraz wanted me gone"

"I'm so sorry" she said.

"It's not your fault" he said.

"I know, but still. I've always had a family and nobody has ever really tried to kill me, so to speak, and… oh, you must have had such a hard life! I cannot even begin to imagine"

"I do not want you to worry over my past" he said, "Let us change the subject of the conversation"

"As long as I get to continue talking to you" she said, smiling. Over the past couple of days she had come to realize that she could say things like this to Caspian without fearing that he would discover her feelings for him, for she was sure she had feelings for him, because he was so unused to talking to another person his age that he simply took those comments as compliments. She was sure the only way to have him find out about her feelings for him would be if she told him, and she wasn't planning on doing that. She knew her time in Narnia might be limited, and she didn't want Caspian hating her when she went back, knowing she would never see him again.

"You know Susan, I honestly enjoy talking to you" he said.

"So do I" she replied.

"And do not worry about your siblings. I swear we will find them"

"You cannot swear that. They could be anywhere, and Narnia isn't exactly small"

"That is true. But I swear I will do my best to find them"

"Why?"

"Because finding them would make you happy, and I enjoy seeing you smile" he said, and she blushed. She had to remind herself that he said those things thinking he was simply complimenting her, the way she said those things to him, and not because he had feelings for her. He simply didn't know how else to interact with another teenager. She didn't mind though, she didn't want him to have feelings for her. It would be worse to leave him if she knew that he returned her feelings and they could never be together than if he hated her.

"You flatter me" she said.

"I only speak the truth. I feel it is important to be honest with people"

"So do I" she said. He chuckled, "What is it?" she asked.

"I find it interesting that only four days ago you and I were complete strangers, and now we can converse so easily"

"I know, it really is strange"

"Maybe not, I mean, we definitely had a connection when we first met"

She felt her heart skip a beat.

"I agree" she said, blushing.

"I wish I could have known you before" he said, "I wish you had been here from the beginning"

"Well, maybe one day we can find a way so that I can be at the beginning with you"

"I would like that" he said, looking as if he were thinking about ways of making this wish possible.

"You majesties" called the Doctor.

"What is it?" called Caspian.

"You might want to see this" he said as he dismounted his horse. Caspian and Susan followed suit, dragging their horses behind them by the reigns. The Doctor was standing in front of a tree that had a message carved in it.

_Life is a Road_

"Peter" said Susan, her hand clapping over her mouth in shock.

"You recognize this sentence your highness?" asked the Doctor.

"Yes… Peter often refers to life as a road. He came up with it while here in Narnia, and has been saying it ever since. This is Peter's work! I know it is! He must be close!"

"Susan, calm down" said Caspian putting a hand on my shoulder, "I don't want to discourage you but I also don't want to put your hopes up too high. Your brother could have carved this the day he arrived in Narnia and could be far from here by now"

"You are right" she said, biting her lip.

"I'm sorry" he said.

"You do not need to be" she said, smiling at him, holding back her tears.

"Please do not cry" he said, pulling her into a hug. She wrapped her arms around him.

"I won't" she whispered.

"Good" he said, stroking my hair. We pulled apart and mounted our horses again. Before we left, I noticed that there was a small arrow pointing towards the East under the carving.

"That way" I said, pointing in the same direction of the arrow.

"But your highness, the next forest is…" started the Doctor, but Susan gave him a stern look and he sighed, "That way" he finished, as he started to gallop in the direction that she had pointed at.

"Susan, why are we going this way?"

"Peter is this way, and I have a feeling that the Narnians are too"

"'This way' is pretty open directions" he said sarcastically.

"Trust me" she said, smiling. He dedicated one of his crooked smiles at her.

"Life is a road" he said, "I like that"

"Me too… he had another saying too… Love is a river"

"That's interesting. What does it mean?"

"I don't know. Maybe that love just flows into your life like a river might do?"

"A river flows into your life?" he asked, teasing her.

"You know what I mean" she said and he laughed.

"I think I'm going to start using that more" he said, "Life is a road, Love is a river"

They continued talking as they rode through the forest, finally stopping for supper and some sleep.

That night Susan couldn't sleep. Peter was close, she could just feel it. She rolled onto her back and watched the stars. She used to watch the stars all the time when she was a queen of Narnia. The stars seemed so much brighter there than in England.

"They're beautiful, aren't they?" she heard Caspian's voice. Her heart skipped a beat.

"They sure are" she said.

"What are you thinking about?"

"Have you ever realized how much you ask me that?" she teased.

"You think a lot, and I want to know what you're thinking about. Is that a crime?"

"Of course not"

"So what are you thinking about?" he repeated.

"Peter" she said, "I know he's close"

"Hm" said Caspian quietly.

"What?"

"Have you ever realized how much you ask me that?"

She laughed, "Well you confuse me a lot"

"I see"

"What was that 'Hm' about?" she asked.

"Well, I was just hoping you were thinking about me"

Her heart started beating faster, but before she could respond he whispered, "Good night" and after a few seconds she noticed his breathing deepening. She rolled onto her side. She couldn't afford to think about Caspian. She couldn't allow her feelings for him to deepen. And as she thought about that, another thought crept into her head and she realized that she wished she could.

xxx

Susan, Caspian and the Doctor rode in what they started to refer to it as the 'that way' direction for three days, with no sign of Peter or of the Narnians. Caspian didn't mention their late night conversation, and Susan did the same.

One day the Doctor stopped and turned to look at Susan.

"Your majesty, are you sure that this is the direction that we are supposed to be going?"

"Yes" she said firmly, "It is the direction Peter wants me to follow, so I will follow it"

"Cornelius, I understand that you are feeling restless, but I trust in Susan's judgement and I think we should continue going that way" he said, smiling at her. She smiled back in appreciation.

"As you wish" said the Doctor, sighing. Susan felt bad for the poor man. He was obviously not as young as he once was and she could understand why he would feel restless. She was feeling pretty restless herself. She wanted to find Peter, but she also wanted to find some Narnians, for Caspian's sake, and for the simple sake of knowing that they were not all extinct. She wouldn't be able to stand it if they were.

They rode in silence for what Susan guessed to be about an hour, when they all heard a small rustling noise. They turned to look around, but didn't see anything. Susan caught a glimpse of something that was staring at them from behind a tree but it disappeared as soon as it noticed her looking at it. She hadn't been able to make out what it was. They heard the rustling noise again, and they started to become nervous. Caspian motioned to Susan and she noticed something else that was staring at them from behind a different tree. She instinctively grabbed Caspian's hand, and he intertwined his fingers with hers. She could feel her heart beating fast, and she wondered if it was because of the unknown things that were watching them or because of how perfectly her fingers and Caspian's fit together.

They heard the rustling noise again and Susan's horse suddenly stood on its back legs, throwing Susan to the ground with a small shriek. Caspian was pulled down with her, and they looked around for what had scared the horse, but couldn't see anything. The Doctor had already dismounted his horse and tied it to a tree and walked over towards them and helped them to their feet. Susan let go of Caspian's hand, wiping the dirt off her already filthy school uniform. Caspian pulled his sword out.

"Who's there?" he called out. Nobody answered, "Show yourself!"

"But we've lived without showing ourselves for so long that it would be strange to suddenly show ourselves" said a small voice.

"Reepicheep!" scolded another voice, this one deeper "Be quiet!"

"But they have already seen us" complained the first voice.

"He does have a point" added a third.

"So do we show ourselves?" asked a fourth.

"No, as Reepicheep said we have lived without showing ourselves for so long that we might as well continue to hide" said the second voice.

"I think Reepicheep needs to learn to keep his mouth shut" said the fourth voice.

"I couldn't agree more" said the second.

"Don't do anything hasty" warned the third.

"Why not? If Reepicheep wants to show himself so badly, let him" said the fourth voice, chuckling.

"Ow, what are you doing, hey let me go!" squealed the first voice and a giant mouse appeared from behind one of the trees. Susan screamed and Caspian pointed his sword at the mouse, who pulled his own sword from a small belt he was wearing.

"Trumpkin!" he called, "They have swords!"

"I can see that" said Trumpkin and Susan could just imagine whoever Trumpkin was rolling his eyes.

"Caspian, lower your sword" said Susan loudly.

"Caspian?" cried Reepicheep the mouse, "Telmarine!"

"Obviously" said Caspian sarcastically, "There are no humans other than Telmarines that reside in Narnia"

"Excuse me" said Susan, putting her hands on her hips, "I am human and am not a Telmarine"

"Very true" said Caspian, "I beg for forgiveness, I did not mean to offend"

"You are forgiven. And you didn't offend me"

"If you are not a Telmarine… what are you?" asked the mouse.

"Well I am obviously a human" she said.

"Yes, but what kind" called the second voice.

"Oh, for crying out loud, just show yourselves already" cried Reepicheep.

"I don't see why not" said the third voice evenly.

"I do. They are Telmarines, and we are… never mind" said the one named Trumpkin.

"You are Narnians" said Caspian confidently. Reepicheep looked at him, surprised.

"How do you know of us?" he asked.

"My tutor" he said, pointing with his face at the Doctor, "has told me all about you. And about your Kings and Queens of Old"

"You know about the Kings and Queens of Old?" asked Reepicheep, lowering his sword.

"Do not let them get in your head Reepicheep! They are Telmarines, it's what they do"

"I beg pardon" interrupted Susan, "But as I have already mentioned, I am not a Telmarine, and I would prefer it if you stopped referring to me as such"

"Who are you then, daughter of Eve?" asked the third voice.

"My name is Susan Pevensie" she said, knowing that if they were true Narnians they would instantly know who she was. As soon as she said this Reepicheep fell to his knees, and the other three Narnians appeared from behind the trees, bowing as well.

"Queen Susan" said the third voice, a rather large badger, "We welcome you back to Narnia"

"Thank you" she said, and when she noticed that they did not rise she quickly added, "You may rise"

She saw that the other two voices belonged to two dwarves, one with a long black beard and the other with a long blonde one.

"Queen Susan, why do you travel in such company?" asked the dwarf with the black beard.

"Because they summoned me" she said.

"You mean…"

"Yes, I blew the horn" said Caspian.

"But why?" asked the badger. Caspian explained his story to them, and how he was seeking Narnians to form an army and reclaim his kingdom, promising to give them Narnians back their land.

"Why should we believe you?" asked the dwarf with the black beard, "For all we know she might not even be Queen Susan"

Susan pulled an arrow out of the case that was slung over her back and pulled Peter's sword out of its cover.

"Is this proof enough for you?" she asked, "Listen, we need your help, as Caspian said we are searching for Narnians, but we are also searching for my brother, Peter"

"High King Peter is in Narnia?" asked the badger.

"Yes, but we don't know where"

"Only that he is that way" said Caspian and Susan laughed but then composed herself.

"King Edmund and Queen Lucy are here as well, but we have lost them too. We would love to find them, but our priority right now is forming an army to defeat Miraz" finished Susan.

"Can you lead us to your people?" asked Caspian.

"Count us in" said Reepicheep, and the rest nodded their heads. Susan smiled at Caspian, squeezing his hand. Things were finally starting to go according to plan


	4. Love is a River

**Love is a River**

As they walked they were told that the dwarf with the black beard was called Nikabrik, the dwarf with the blonde beard was Trumpkin and the badger was named Trufflehunter. Caspian walked along Trumpkin and Trufflehunter, slowly but surely convincing them that he wasn't just any Telmarine, that he actually wanted to help them. Susan chatted animatedly with Reepicheep and the Doctor seemed to be in deep conversation with Nikabrik, and the only thing Susan could pick out of that conversation was that the Doctor's mother was a black dwarf, like Nikabrik.

Reepicheep was certainly an interesting character, and as much as Susan enjoyed talking to him she wished she could be talking with Caspian instead, remembering how perfectly their hands had fit together, and wanting to slip her hand into his again.

"So, what exactly is this 'that way' joke?" asked Reepicheep after Caspian had turned to ask Susan if they were going the right way and she had said that they were still going 'that way' for the third time. Susan tried not to think that Caspian was just trying to find an excuse to talk to her, but she couldn't help but think it. And she couldn't help but be happy when she thought about it.

"Well, several days ago we saw a carving on one of the trees, that said _Life is a road_, and I recognized that as…"

"High King Peter's work" said Reepicheep. Susan smiled down at him.

"Yes. And under it there was an arrow pointing in the direction that we are headed, and I told Caspian and the Doctor that we needed to go 'that way', and they seemed to find it comical, so it stuck"

"You know Queen Susan, it surprises me how close you seem to be to the young Telmarine prince" observed Reepicheep.

"It surprises me too" she said, "But Caspian is a kind, brave young man, and his intentions are pure. He will make a great king some day"

"Well, if you trust in him, that is all the assurance I need" said the mouse, and Susan felt another smile creep onto her face. She looked up at the back of Caspian's head and noticed that he had turned around and was looking at her too. He smiled and she turned her gaze away quickly, blushing.

"It's getting dark" announced Trumpkin, even though they could all see that it was getting dark, "We should settle down for the night"

Everybody agreed, and within the next two hours they had built a large fire and everyone except Susan and Caspian had dozed off. Susan lay down, and so did Caspian, who was sitting beside her.

"The stars are truly brighter in Narnia" said Susan, and Caspian grunted his agreement.

"You know" he said, "I haven't been able to talk to you much since the Narnians joined us. Not that I'm complaining, I'm glad they are here, I just wish that I didn't have to spend my entire day convincing them that I'm not a regular Telmarine"

"I think you're doing a great job" she said assuringly, "Reepicheep is officially on your side"

"So are Trumpkin and Trufflehunter" said Caspian, "But Nikabrik seems… unsure"

"Give it time. It's only been a day and you already have three out of four in your favour. Talk to Nikabrik tomorrow, I'm sure he'll come 'round"

"I hope so" he said.

They lay in silence and Susan thought about how Caspian had asked her three times that day if they were going in the right direction, and how he had been looking at her that one time. She thought about how their fingers fit together so perfectly and about how wonderful it felt when he held her close.

"What are you thinking about?" whispered Caspian.

"I don't want to tell you" she whispered.

"Why not? You always answer when I ask you"

"Yes, but I do not want to tell you, because if I did I would be forced to lie to you, and I do not wish to lie"

"I see" he said, and she could sense that she was smiling by the way he said those words. They were both quiet for several seconds and then for the first time in the seven days that they had known each other Susan asked him what he was thinking instead of the other way around.

"I was thinking about how good it felt knowing you had been thinking about me"

She didn't try to correct him. He was right, and he knew it. She rolled on her side.

"Good night Caspian" she said, and he did the same.

"Good night Susan"

That night, Susan fell asleep with butterflies in her stomach, knowing that Caspian was so close to her.

xxx

The next morning everybody got up early and started walking, still following the 'that way' direction, which seemed to not only be the direction that Peter was in, but also the direction that the Narnians were in. That day Caspian focused on talking to Nikabrik, trying to convince him that he was not like most Telmarines, and Susan got better acquainted with Trumpkin and Trufflehunter who seemed to get along the best amongst the group of Narnians. The Doctor and Reepicheep seemed to be having a very interesting conversation, but Susan didn't pay much attention to them. There was one small argument between Trumpkin and Reepicheep over the direction they were headed in, but it ended as soon as Trumpkin assured Reepicheep that if they continued going 'that way' they would arrive quicker than if they went in a northern direction and Susan had laughed. Apparently Caspian had told them about the 'that way' joke too.

As the day wore on, Susan had to admit that she was truly enjoying her conversation with Trumpkin and Trufflehunter, but she still wished she was talking to Caspian. She honestly wished she didn't, but she couldn't help herself from glancing at him every once in a while. Once she had caught him glancing back, and she had blushed but she hadn't looked away, simply smiled at him and then casually gone back to her conversation. She wondered what he thought of her, wishing she could know. Was she just a friend to him, or did he feel the same tingle every time she said his name and go to sleep with butterflies in his stomach because they were lying next to each other? She wouldn't know until she asked him, and she had already decided that she would do no such thing, because if she asked him then she would have to admit to him that she had feelings for him, and that would only lead to heartbreak. No, things were better as they were, with no complications, just friends. But she couldn't help but wish for more.

Around mid-day the small group stopped by a river that they found for some water and a small rest. Susan took this as an opportunity to talk to Caspian, but the Doctor got to him before she could. Reluctantly she sat down by Trumpkin and began discussing how much Narnia had changed since the days when her and her siblings ruled it. She noticed a large rock a ways down from where they were, and she felt strangely attracted to it. She excused herself and stood up to look at it. There was moss growing all over the front of it, but as she got closer she realized that there were constant holes in the moss, and when she stood right in front of it she saw that there was something written on it.

"Caspian!" she called and she turned just in time to see him standing up and running towards her.

"What is it, is something wrong?" he asked, and she shook her head.

"Peter" she said simply pointing to the rock. Caspian turned and read what it said.

"_Love is a river_" he read out loud, and then he turned to Susan, who was smiling widely. He suddenly had her pulled against him in a tight hug. She responded quickly, hugging him back.

"We must be getting closer" he whispered and she nodded, inhaling his smell. He smelt like a strange combination of sweat, horse and nature that somehow worked and created a unique smell that could only work on Caspian. To Susan nothing had ever smelt so beautifully.

She pulled away from him and noticed another small arrow under where Peter had written the words, this one pointing towards the North.

"We need to head north" she said, and Caspian nodded, calling Trumpkin over.

"Yes my prince?" he asked.

"We need to head north. Is this the same direction that the Narnians are in?" he asked.

"Actually… yes. How did you know?"

"It's like Peter knew where the Narnians would be" said Susan, and Trumpkin looked confused but didn't ask.

"We should continue" said Caspian, and Trumpkin nodded. He called everybody and they all walked towards them.

"My prince, if we could continue the talk we were having before…" started Nikabrik, but Caspian shook his head.

"I would like to speak to Queen Susan" he said, and Susan felt her heart skip a beat as Caspian turned to her and gave her a crooked smile.

"You need to stop doing that" said Susan when they were out of earshot from the rest of the group, walking far behind them but still close enough to notice if they made a sudden change in the direction.

"Doing what?" he asked innocently.

"Smiling at me like that" she said.

"And why would I do that when I know it makes you blush?" he asked, and she blushed, looking away.

"Lot's of things you say make me blush. I am simply not used to receiving so many compliments" she said, trying to make excuses, knowing where the conversation was headed.

"Are you sure it's just that?" asked Caspian and Susan sighed.

"I don't know how to answer that" she said. Caspian chuckled.

"You know Susan, I'm glad that you and your siblings showed up separately, or I would have never been able to get to know you the way I have" he said, and Susan smiled.

"I'm kind of glad too… but at the same time I want to find them. I'm extremely worried"

"You should smile more" he said.

"And why is that?"

"Because you have a beautiful smile" he replied matter of factly. Susan blushed.

"I've been smiling a lot more since I met you" she admitted, "Although Peter does make me smile a lot too"

"Susan, how long are you staying in Narnia?" he asked suddenly. Susan looked up at him, surprised by his question. He looked away and for the first time she noticed him blushing.

"I don't know" she admitted, "But I do know that every day that I spend here makes me less and less excited about returning to England"

"I wish you didn't have to go back" he said quietly and she smiled.

"You see Caspian? You make me smile"

"When you go back I won't see you smile anymore"

"We need to stop talking about me leaving" she said, "It's making me feel sad. Why can't we just enjoy right now without worrying about me leaving or anything else?"

Caspian was silent for a few seconds and then he sighed.

"I think I've gained Nikabrik's trust" he said finally, "Hopefully with the four of them on my side it will be easier to convince the rest of the Narnians that I am not against them"

"You're going to make a wonderful king" said Susan, smiling at him, "And the woman you choose to be your queen will be very lucky"

"It is impossible for the woman I want to be my queen to end up as so" he whispered.

"And why is that?" asked Susan, her heart beating faster.

"Because she does not want me" he whispered.

"What in the world would make you think that?"

"She is not willing to stay for me" he said.

"She might not have a choice"

"There is always a choice"

"Not always"

"Then there must be a way to…"

"Caspian" said Susan sharper than she had wanted too. Caspian looked down at her, pain in his eyes.

"I have an unfinished conversation with Nikabrik" he said, his fist balling up. Susan watched him speed up to pass her and finally end up standing by Nikabrik who turned to give Susan a knowing evil grin and then turned back to Caspian. Susan bit her lip, forcing herself not to cry.

'It's better this way' she thought to herself, and she just kept repeating that phrase over and over again in her mind. So why didn't it feel better? She wanted so bad to just run up to Caspian and apologize and kiss him, swearing that she would stay with him forever, for she knew that he had been talking about her, but she knew she couldn't swear that. As she had said, she didn't really have a choice. She would have to return to England sooner or later. It was her home, even if Narnia felt more like a home to her, now more than ever.

She walked alone at the end of the group, trying to think of anything but of Caspian, but their short conversation just kept rolling around in her head. Both had basically confessed their feelings for each other, and she had rejected him, and she felt terrible about it. She knew that Caspian must hate her, and the thought of that finally forced the tears that had been building up over the past hour to finally spill out. She cried silently, hugging herself as she walked slowly, bringing up the end.

"Queen Susan!" she heard Reepicheep call. She looked up; whipping tears from her face, hoping nobody would notice that she had been crying.

"Yes?" she called back, hoping that her voice didn't crack

"We have arrived" he said, and Susan looked up. What she saw took her breath away. The Narnians had constructed an entire city far from the view of the Telmarines, in a place that they knew they would never be found. Even though it was in clearing there was forest surrounding it, shielding it completely from anybody looking in from the outside. As she walked through the city, many turned to watch them. She was surprised to find talking animals and centaurs actually co-existing with Minotaur's and dwarves. She had to remind herself that it had been thirteen hundred years since the white witch had been defeated and that they will all Narnians, thus all had been forced into hiding. It made sense that they would be working together.

"Ah, Trumpkin, Nikabrik, Trufflehunter, Reepicheep" said a large centaur, walking up to them, "We have been awaiting your return. Come, there is someone you all need to meet. We will discuss the presences of these Telmarines with him" when he said the word 'Telmarines' he grimaced as if he had just said a bad word. Susan wanted to point out that she wasn't a Telmarine, but she didn't have the strength. Her fight with Caspian and seeing the Narnian city had simply drained all of the energy out of her body. What she wanted to do more than anything else was curl up in a nice, cosy bed and fall asleep. Instead she followed the large centaur into a cave. Once again she had a vague feeling of familiarity as she walked through the cave, guided mainly by the sound of the centaurs' hooves, but she didn't ask where they were. Finally, they arrived in a large circular room, and Susan saw a young man sitting in front of a stone table that was split… right down the middle… she gasped as she recognized where they were, wondering when it had become part of the Narnian underground. The centaur walked up to the young man and bowed before whispering something in his ear. The young man sat up abruptly after he heard the word 'Telmarines'. He stood up. He was tall with blonde hair and deep blue eyes. He had the same unhealthy look of someone who hadn't eaten for days and had suddenly been stuffed full of food. He seemed familiar. Very familiar.

"So," he said, "I've just been informed that we have three Telmarines in our presence" he said. Susan could have recognized his voice anywhere. Her heart leapt.

"Peter?" she asked cautiously. Her brother turned in her direction, and started to stalk towards her.

"That's High King Peter to you Telma…" he stopped short, recognizing his sister. His eyes widened in shock and a giant smile appeared on his face.

"Susan!" he basically screamed and the siblings ran to each other, Peter catching her in a hug that lifted her feet of the ground. And for a moment, if only for just one moment, everything seemed alright again.


	5. I've Been Waiting So Long

**I've Been Waiting So Long**

Word spread fast that Queen Susan had returned to Narnia along with her brother and in the company of two Telmarines. When they were alone Susan explained everything that had happened to Peter, leaving out the parts about her and Caspian. After she clarified several times that Caspian meant to fight Miraz for his kingdom and give the Narnians back their land, Peter agreed not to send Caspian away. For the next three days Susan and Peter spent all their time together, talking about everything that had been happening since they both returned to Narnia, and both expressing their concerns as to the whereabouts of Edmund and Lucy.

Peter explained that he had gone to the bathroom while at Jacob's house and when he looked in the mirror he had seen himself the way he had looked as a king of Narnia, and when he had gotten closer he had fallen through the mirror and into Narnia. At first he had been confused as to what had happened, but then he realized where he was and he was overjoyed, but he wondered how it was that he had come alone. He walked for days, leaving both markings knowing that if Susan, Edmund or Lucy saw them they would know that he had left them, until finally he had found the Narnians who had instantly recognized him. They had told him everything that had happened since they left, and Peter had sworn revenge on the Telmarines for causing such pain to his people. He had been overjoyed to receive his sword, but had become concerned when Susan told him that Lucy and Edmund had been at Cair Paravel as well, before her, Caspian and the Doctor had gotten there, and she admitted that she believed that that was where they had arrived. Peter had calmed down when she told him that their chests had been emptied of all the possessions that they owned that could be useful if ever encountering a Telmarine, but he was still concerned about them wandering about Narnia alone.

On the third night in the Narnian city, Susan noticed that Peter seemed to want to speak to her alone, so after they had eaten dinner along with Caspian, the Doctor, Trumpkin, Nikabrik, Trufflehunter and Reepicheep and everyone else had retired to their dormitories Susan had followed Peter into his room.

"Susan, you travelled with Caspian for eight days, am I right?" he asked. Susan bit her lip. She had been expecting this conversation.

"Yes, that's right" she said, trying to remain calm.

"And the Narnians only joined you on your seventh day of journey, correct?"

"Yes"

"So did you two not… click, or something? Because you seem extremely hostile to each other for two people that spent seven days with basically only each other for company"

"No, we got along great, we just got into a bit of a tiff is all" she said, trying not to burst into tears. Not talking to Caspian had been much more difficult than she had initially expected, and she had expected it to be difficult.

"A bit of a tiff? Susan, I haven't seen you two exchange a word since you arrived here, and when you got here you had obviously been crying. Susan, what happened?"

"Nothing happened…"

"Don't lie to me Susan"

Susan sat on his bed and put her head in her hands. She could feel the tears welling up in her eyes as she told Peter everything, about every conversation they had, about how he made her feel, about how their hands fit perfectly together… and about how he had basically confessed his feelings to her and she had had to reject him because she knew she would have to go back to England. By the time she finished she was bawling, and Peter was hugging her and comforting her in a way that only a brother could.

"It's not your fault… he must know how badly you want to stay here forever. Honestly Susan, I want to stay here forever too. If I had the choice I would choose Narnia over England hands down, but the way things are at the moment I don't really think we have the choice"

"That's what I told him" she mumbled.

After a few seconds of silent embrace Peter kissed her head.

"Why don't you go for a walk?" he suggested, "The fauns play beautiful music at night"

She nodded, wiping the tears from her cheeks and eyes, leaving her brother.

The Narnian city was deserted at night, except for the fauns who all sat by the door of their houses and played their music and even though every faun played a different tune they all mixed together perfectly to form the most beautiful music that Susan had ever heard. She found a lone tree and sat under it, letting the sound of the music surround her.

"Your majesty" she heard the Doctor as he sat down beside her.

"Doctor" she nodded courteously. She had asked the Doctor time and time again to call her Susan, but he refused.

"Is there… something on your mind, your highness?" he asked. Susan bit her lip, remembering how many times Caspian had asked her a similar question and she forced herself not to cry.

"Doctor… is there a way that my brother and I could… remain in Narnia? As in not return to England?"

The Doctor thought about her question.

"I do not know" he answered truthfully, "Perhaps"

"Please explain" urged Susan.

"The Telmarines" he started, "Their origins do not simply date back to Telmar. They are sons of Adam and daughters of Ever, the same way you and your siblings. They also came from your world, and yet managed to remain in ours"

"So there must be a way" she said hopefully.

"Only Aslan knows" he said. Susan sighed.

"Aslan… I had expected him to show up by now" she admitted.

"And why is that my queen?"

"Well, last time we were here…"

"Ah yes, but things never happen the same way twice" he answered, cutting her off.

"That sounds like something Aslan would say" she mumbled.

They sat in silence for a few seconds, both consumed in their own thoughts.

"I must leave you, your majesty, but if I may say something else?"

"Please"

"There is a fabulous tailor here. Might I suggest a change of attire?"

"Thank you" answered Susan, knowing she had been wearing the same outfit for over ten days. There were mud stains and rips all over it, and she wondered how her mother would react if she saw her uniform in its current state.

"Good night my queen"

"Good night Doctor"

xxx

The next few nights Susan wandered the Narnian city, discovering many secret hideouts and the best places to enjoy the faun's music. The tailor had made for her the most beautiful dresses she had ever seen, and she was in constant fear of tearing them or getting them dirty. Since she was no longer talking to Caspian she spent most of her days with Peter, but when he met with Caspian to discuss ways to proceed with their attack plan, she would wander the city alone, taking every thing in.

On the seventh night of her stay in the city Peter joined her on her nightly expedition, wanting to know what it was exactly that she did when she was alone. They settled in a small opening between the trees only a few metres away from the city, the place that Susan had deemed the most private place to listen to the music.

"Do you think we have a chance of winning?" asked Susan. Peter sighed.

"Yes, I believe we do. The Telmarines will never see a Narnian attack coming, they believe we are extinct. With Caspian and myself leading our troops we have a very slight chance of failure"

"I hope we find Edmund and Lucy before we go off" mumbled Susan.

"As do I" agreed her brother, "But the chances of that happening are extremely slim. We are lucky to have found each other!"

"You are lucky to have found the Narnians" said Susan, and Peter nodded.

"Indeed"

They sat in comfortable silence for several minutes, Susan laying her head on his shoulder.

"I've been waiting so long for this" whispered Peter.

"For what?" asked Susan.

"This. Our return to Narnia."

"So have I" said Susan, "But I would not have been had I known how difficult it would be to leave"

"Let's not speak of leaving" said Peter, "We do not want to get in a… tiff, like you and Caspian did"

"Let's not speak of Caspian either" said Susan sternly, "Every time I hear his name my heart skips a beat, and I do not like it. It is killing me not to speak to him and I wish I had the courage to approach him and apologize"

"Alright" said Peter.

"How long were you here before we arrived?"

"Only a day"

"And yet you were already their leader as if you had been here forever"

"It was quite strange, at first they thought I was a Telmarine. I was of course confused as to why they would think me as such, for when we lived here there were no Telmarines in Narnia. When I cleared up that I was no Telmarine but Peter Pevensie, High King of Narnia they instantly proclaimed me their leader"

"And they believed you just like that?" asked Susan, remembering how Reepicheep, Trumpkin, Trufflehunter and Nikabrik had instantly believed she was Queen Susan when she had told them her name.

"Indeed. They said they had been expecting me for quite some time, but were confused as to who had summoned us"

"Caspian" mumbled Susan.

"Yes. It makes sense now"

"We should be getting to bed soon" said Susan, guessing that they would not be able to avoid the two subjects that they were desperately trying to ignore for much longer. Peter nodded and helped her too her feet. They walked in silence, listening to the music that the fauns played. Every night it was different, and every night it seemed more beautiful than the last.

"Good night Susan" said Peter when they reached their quarters. Susan nodded and quickly changed into her night gown and curled up in her soft bed, wanting the constant thoughts of Caspian to finally cease once and for all.


	6. What You Did To My Heart

**What You Did To My Heart**

Susan woke up the next morning feeling strangely well rested. She looked to her doorway and saw Peter leaning against the doorframe, the door ajar, with a smug look on his face.

"Good morning sleeping beauty," he joked, and Susan rolled her eyes.

"What time is it?" she asked.

"About time to go to sleep" he said, chuckling.

"How long have you been standing there?"

"Only a few seconds actually. I was thinking of waking you up, Trufflehunter made his special soup for dinner, and I thought you might want some.

"How considerate" she said, rubbing her eyes, "I'll be right down"

"Alright, I'll tell everyone to wait for you"

He disappeared and Susan slipped into a long red dress with gold trimmings, her favourite out of her new outfits. She walked down the stairs of the house her brother and her were staying in and saw everyone sitting at the table, including Caspian who had only eaten with them two or three times since they arrived in the city. She looked away from him, her heart beating faster, butterflies flying around in her stomach. She sat down as far away from Caspian as possible and began talking to Trufflehunter about something that was probably extremely meaningless. She wasn't really paying attention to what they were talking about. It was as if Caspian's presence was intoxicating her. It had been at least four or five days since the last time she saw him, and she had almost forgotten the way that she reacted to him. She stood up suddenly, thanked Trufflehunter for the food and decided to go on her late night walk early, knowing she would be outside for a long time. She made her way to the same spot that her and Peter had been about 24 hours ago. She sat down carefully and brought her knees up to her chest, wondering why it was that Caspian had such an affect on her. He hated her, so why did she still see only the good things of him? How his eyes sparkled when he laughed, and only when he laughed, how he blew the hair out of his face even though he knew that it would do absolutely nothing until finally after several times pushing it away with his hands. How he could just glance at her and give her the urge to smile.

"Susan?" she heard Peter's voice, and she looked up at him. She realized that she was crying.

"Yes?"

"Oh, please don't cry!" he exclaimed, helping her up and wiping the tears from under her eyes with his thumbs. She smiled at him.

"Peter, how is it that you can always make me smile, even when you haven't done anything?"

"I must just have that affect on you" he said, "Why did you leave?"

She looked away, sniffling. He sighed knowingly and simply said "Caspian"

"I just… I don't know what's happening to me! I see him and even though I know he hates me I…"

"He doesn't hate you," said Peter, looking at her confused.

"What?"

"Why would you think that Caspian hates you? He thinks you hate him, that's why he hasn't been talking to you"

"What?" she cried, "Why would I hate him?"

"Well, you were the one that snapped at him," reasoned Peter.

"Are you taking his side?"

"What side? You make it sound like you had an argument!"

"You weren't there…"

"You told me what happened, remember? And so did Caspian"

"Caspian told you?"

"Of course. We spend a lot of time together you know," he said. Susan let what Peter had said sink in. Caspian didn't hate her; he thought that she hated him. But why would she hate him? He made her feel alive…

In the distance the fauns started playing their music and Susan instantly felt more relaxed. She sat back down, sighing.

"I don't hate Caspian," she whispered and Peter sat down beside her.

"I know you don't Susan. I told Caspian that… but he didn't believe me"

"Maybe he didn't want to believe you," she said, and Peter looked at her, an eyebrow raised.

"Explain"

"Well, when I first met Caspian I realized that he was the kind of person that I might end up having feelings for, but instead of distancing myself as I should have done I got to know him better. And now I don't want to leave Narnia, even though I know I have too, and it's his fault. Maybe he didn't want to believe you because he felt that it would be easier for me to simply leave without having any more connection with him…"

"I don't think that's what he thinks"

"How would you know?"

"I told you we spend a lot of time together" he paused, looking at the ground as if thinking about what to say next, and he finally took a deep breath, "He misses you, you know"

"And what, you think I don't miss him? All I've wanted to do for the past eight days is sit down and have a nice long conversation with him! But I can't, because I never see him!"

"And when you do you run away" said Peter casually. She sighed.

"I couldn't take the tension," she said. Peter put an arm around her.

"I understand"

"Peter!" Susan heard Caspian's voice, and her heart skipped a beat. No, he couldn't be here, not now. She quickly wiped her tears away, not wanting him to see her crying over him.

"Caspian" said Peter standing up. Susan was surprised and at the same time not surprised at all by how familiar they were with each other.

"I was wondering if I may have a word with Susan" said Caspian, and Susan blushed, feeling that familiar tingle.

"Of course" said Peter, glancing at Susan who nodded. She looked away as she felt Caspian sitting beside her.

She had so many things she wanted to say to him, but she couldn't put words to any of them. She bit her lip and glanced at Caspian. He was staring at the ground, his eyes shut, his fist clenched.

"Susan…" he started, and Susan looked at him curiously, honestly wanting to hear what he had to say, "I… I understand that you have to leave. And I'm sorry that I asked so much of you"

"Don't be sorry" she responded, and he looked up at her, his eyes opening in surprise, "I should apologize. I snapped"

"But it was rational" he said, and Susan sighed.

"No Caspian, it wasn't. I snapped because you wanted me to stay, and that made me want to stay, and I knew that was impossible"

"Do you still know that?"

"Yes" she said, and he sighed.

"Please don't leave" he said suddenly and Susan stood up, walking a few steps away from him.

"Don't tell me not to leave," she said, hugging her chest, not able to look at him. He walked up behind her.

"Why not?"

"Because you make me want to stay," she whispered. Caspian sighed, standing behind her awkwardly. She wanted more than anything for him to wrap his arms around her waist.

"If it was possible… would you stay?"

"You know I would," she said, feeling the tears welling up in her eyes again. She barely ever cried, and yet Caspian had been making her cry more in the past eight days than she had cried in her entire life.

"Then I will find a way"

"How? How will you find a way?" she asked.

"I do not know," he answered truthfully, "But I do know that I will not rest until I find a way to make things work"

"Caspian…" she said, sighing, "Listen to me carefully. The way I feel for you I have never felt for anybody else… it's… it's not normal"

"What isn't normal?" he asked, and she heard a branch crunch underneath his foot. He was moving closer.

"What you've done to my heart!" she exclaimed. She heard him chuckle, and she turned to face him. He was closer than she had expected him to be.

"Why are you laughing at me?" she asked, hands on her hips.

"I am not laughing at you," he said, smiling, faking innocence. She rolled her eyes.

"Yes you are. That is not very kind of you"

"But I wasn't laughing at you"

"Yes, you were. I just admitted my feelings to you and you are laughing at me" she crossed her arms over her chest.

"No, now you have admitted your feelings for me" he said, giving her that crooked smile that had haunted her dreams since she met him.

"And you are laughing at me"

"I am not laughing at you!" he said, laughing. Susan turned and started to walk away from him.

"Susan, don't leave," he said, and she stopped.

"Why shouldn't I?"

"Because I haven't spoken to you for over a week, and I have missed you"

"Oh have you?"

"Yes"

"Then why are you laughing at me?"

"I am not… never mind. Yes Susan, I am laughing at you"

"Thank you. Now explain why you are laughing at me"

"I do not know" he said, walking towards her.

"I will not accept that" she said, turning towards him. Once again he was closer than she would have expected. She took in his face, the way his hair framed it so perfectly…

"Ugh!" she grunted, turning from him.

"Now what have I done?" he asked, chuckling.

"You have done nothing," she said.

"Then why are you angry at me?"

"Because you annoy me," she said, turning to smile at him sarcastically.

"Oh, do I?" he asked, walking towards her, placing an arm on each shoulder.

"Yes"

"And how do I annoy you?"

"You annoy me by not leaving me, even when you aren't with me you seem to be with me. I cannot stop thinking about you, I cannot imagine continuing my life without you, even though I know I will have to"

"So I annoy you because you love me," he said, and Susan blushed. She looked away, without answering him. Once again she could not correct him because she knew he was right.

"What are you thinking about?" he asked.

"I am wondering how it is you say things like that so easily"

"Things like what?"

"Things like assuming that I love you"

"But you do, do you not?"

"Do not change the subject," she said.

"I can say those things so easily because I know they are true, and I am not afraid to admit them"

"Then why haven't you told me that you love me yet?" she asked, her face flushing. She could not believe she had just said that.

"Why is it that you ask me how I can say such things so easily, and then turn around and say the same thing?"

"I… I do not normally say things so bluntly… I am not usually so bold"

"I like that you are bold"

"I am not bold"

"You are very bold. You are also sincere, funny, easy to talk to and beautiful"

"You flatter me," she said, blushing.

"I only speak the truth"

"No, because I am not bold and I am definitely not beautiful"

"How can you say such a thing with such a serious look on your face? How could you not think you are beautiful?"

"Compared to you…"

"So you admit to thinking I am beautiful?" he asked, smirking.

"Yes"

"Well then you must admit that you are beautiful too"

"But I am not"

"Yes you are. To me you are. Why must you argue against me?"

"Fine" she said, sighing.

"You admit you are beautiful?"

"No, I admit that I do not wish to argue against you because I have already lost a very valuable week with you and I do not wish to loose another one"

"I agree," said Caspian, looking completely serious. He watched her for several seconds in silence and she couldn't help but smile.

"What are you thinking?" she asked.

"I am not thinking right now," he said, and she chuckled.

"You have to be thinking! It's not possible to simply not be thinking!"

"When I am with you my brain turns off and all I see is you," he breathed. Susan felt the butterflies in her stomach intensify.

"But you are still thinking"

"Alright then. I am thinking about you"

"And why in the world would you be thinking about me?"

"Because I love you" he said, and Susan smiled.

"We're in so much trouble," she said.

"And why is that?" asked Caspian, leaning his face towards hers.

"Because we were not supposed to fall in love"

"Why not?"

"Because I am meant to leave. I will eventually go back to England"

"But you are not leaving yet, are you?"

"No, I am not"

"Then let us just enjoy the time we have," he said, and before she knew it his lips had met hers.


	7. Unafraid Of The Future

Unafraid of the Future

Susan could not believe how perfect every second alone with Caspian was. Every moment they spent together took her breath away, and every time she thought about leaving Narnia her brain blocked the thought out and she found herself thinking about how their lips fit so perfectly together. The war was drawing nearer and nearer and she became more and more sure that they could win. She sat in on several of Peter and Caspian's war planning sessions and Caspian began to join everybody for dinner at Trufflehunter's house again.

Susan was very aware that people knew the true nature of her and Caspian's relationship, even if they both insisted that they were just good friend. Nobody other than Susan, Caspian and Peter knew the true reason why they had not been speaking for so long and suddenly seemed closer than ever. Susan had only told her brother what had happened after he left, and he had warned her that her and Caspian should have just continued being friends. She knew he was right, and yet being with Caspian was the best thing that had ever happened to her, and she did not want to end it, even if she knew that it would not last forever.

The only thing that was forbidding her from completely happy was the knowledge that Edmund and Lucy were still somewhere in Narnia, probably lost and confused. She had suggested several times since they arrived in the city that they arrange a search party for her siblings, but every time the idea was rejected, claiming that they could not risk sending any Narnians outside of the village in fear of the Telmarines discovering that they were not extinct.

"Do not worry" had comforted Caspian, taking her hand in his, "We will find them"

"How can you be sure?"

"Because we found Peter" he whispered, and she felt completely reassured. Somehow Caspian had a way of making her feel like everything he said was true, and she found herself not fearing for their future as soon as he told her they would make it through anything that life threw at them.

xxx

Susan woke up one morning, exactly fourteen days after her and Caspian had shared their first kiss, and could instantly sense that something was wrong. She walked down to the dinning room and found Caspian sitting alone at the table. She slid into a chair beside him.

"What is wrong?" she asked.

"Telmarines" said Caspian quietly, "Two of them. They were spotted this morning"

Susan's eyes widened.

"What does this mean?"

"We do not know yet. The minotaur who spotted them is searching for them"

"Well if that isn't enough to scare them away I do not know what is" she replied, and Caspian nodded.

"The problem is that they saw the Minotaur. They know there are still Narnians out there"

"Do not worry," said Susan, patting his back. The door burst open and Peter came in, completely out of breath.

"Susan!" he exclaimed

"Yes?"

"Come quickly, you too Caspian"

"What is it?" asked Susan.

"They found the Telmarines and brought them to me. You are never going to believe this" he started to run and Susan and Caspian followed him.

"Do you have any idea what is going on?" asked Susan and Caspian grinned at her.

"I have an idea"

"Care to share this idea?"

"I would rather not. I do not want you to be disappointed if I am incorrect"

"Disappointed?" asked Susan, completely lost. She was beginning to run out of breath, having forgotten just how far from Trufflehunter's house was from the cave where the split table was.

"Yes" and with that Caspian set his eyes ahead, on Peters back. Susan tried to imagine what he was talking about, but her brain simply wasn't working. When they finally reached the cave Susan stopped to catch her breath, leaning on the wall.

"There's no time for that Susan!" cried Peter, and Susan groaned, following her brother until they reached the place where she had first encountered Peter.

She wasn't exactly sure what to expect, she had never seen Telmarine soldiers before, and the only Telmarines she had ever really known had been Caspian and the Doctor. She had seen Telmarines when she first arrived in Narnia, but nowhere else.

What she saw took every breath out of her lungs.

Standing in front of her were a young boy and girl, the boy no older than 14 and the girl probably only 12 or 13. She didn't recognize the girls' long ringlets, or the boys' shaggy black hair. She didn't recognize the girls deep blue eyes or the boys tall lanky body. What she recognized was the small phial that the girl wore around her neck as if it were a necklace. She covered her mouth with her hands as tears appeared in the corners of her eyes.

"Susan, you look BEAUTIFUL!" cried her sister as she ran towards her, and Susan met her with a giant hug. She ran her hands through Lucy's hair, pulling her away from herself.

"Your hair!"

"Do you like it?" asked Lucy innocently.

"I love it! And Ed!" she cried, running towards her younger brother and hugging him as if she hadn't seen him for years, kissing his cheek.

"Ew, Susan! You act as if I just came back from the dead," joked her brother and Susan smiled at him.

"You guys are the Telmarines?" she asked, and they shrugged.

"Apparently. Why did you guys think we were Telmarines anyway? They told us that the Telmarines never came to this area"

"They?" asked Susan.

"That's the best part," said Peter, a giant grin on his face, "Edmund and Lucy have found another Narnian city!"

"And we believe that they would agree to join your cause" said Edmund assuringly. Susan could barely recognize her own brother. His hair had grown longer and his voice seemed to have deepened. When she looked at him again she realized that he wasn't as lanky as he had been before. He looked like a true king… like he had when they had ruled Narnia.

"Is this what you expected?" she asked, turning to Caspian who nodded, smiling smugly. Edmund and Lucy noticed his presence for the first time and Edmund quickly drew his sword.

"Telmarine!"

"No, Ed!" cried Peter, "This is Caspian!"

"Oh" said Edmund putting his sword away, "Hello"

"Hello" said Caspian, raising and eyebrow and Susan laughed.

"Susan, why don't you show Lu around the city? I think we need to… catch Edmund up"

Susan nodded and her and Lucy left. She smiled at Caspian as she left, and he gave her one of his crooked smiles and then did the same to Lucy who flushed. Susan giggled and led Lucy out of the cave.

"Who is he?" asked Lucy, her eyes wide, her cheeks still red.

"Caspian" said Susan, smiling. Lucy grinned at her mischievously.

"He is very handsome" she said simply and Susan shrugged, not sure if her sister was old enough to understand her and Caspian's relationship.

"I suppose. He is a very kind man though, and he will make a wonderful king when he reclaims his kingdom"

"Do you fancy him?"

"Lucy!"

"What? It wouldn't surprise me…"

"Well to answer your question, no I do not fancy him" she said, sounding almost disgusted at the childish word.

"So you love him then?" asked her sister. Susan looked at her surprised. It seemed Edmund wasn't the only one who had changed while they were separated. And to think it had only been a month…

"Can you keep a secret Lu?"

"Obviously" said Lucy, rolling her eyes.

"Alright. Yes, I do love Caspian"

"I knew it! And does he love you back?"

"Yes"

"It must be because you are so beautiful," said Lucy grinning, and Susan laughed.

"You can talk! What happened to you and Edmund?"

"We appeared by Cair Paravel," said Lucy, looking at the ground sadly, "We were very… disturbed… when we recognized it. We found our room with all our possessions, took ours and left as fast as we could. We travelled through the forest for several days. It was not much fun… we were almost constantly hungry and we found ourselves weaker and weaker every day. Around the fifth or sixth day since we arrived a centaur centurion found us and recognized who we were. He took us back to his city, saying that they were the only Narnians left. They told us the story of the Telmarines. We have been living there since then, reigning over them, unsure as to why we were there at all"

"Caspian summoned us"

"Yes, Peter has explained everything to us," said her younger sister.

"You have changed Lu. You and Edmond both"

"We have not changed. We have changed back," said Lucy with a smile. Susan had to agree with her sister. Since she had been in Narnia she seemed to be returning to the way she had been as a Queen, more kind and gentle than she seemed to be in England.

"True. But you have also changed physically" she said, and Lucy nodded.

"One of the female centaurs asked for my permission to… fool around with my hair, and she ended up coming up with a way to keep it this way for as long as I wish it. It was also she who suggested Edmund grow his hair out"

"It looks good on him," said Susan, smiling.

"Peter has become very handsome too" commented Lucy.

"Indeed" replied Susan, "He has let his hair grow as well"

"He's so built…" said Lucy and Susan nodded, although her thoughts were no longer on Peter but on Caspian.

"Anyway, what have you been doing?" she asked, and Susan smiled. She told her sister everything that had happened since she got to Narnia. Lucy got upset when Susan told her about her and Caspian not speaking, but her expression changed completely when Susan told her about their conversation in the forest.

"So he kissed you?" she squealed, and Susan shushed her. Lucy rolled her eyes, "Please Susan, if I could tell almost instantly I think that everybody here will have noticed already"

Susan thought about what her sister had just said and sighed.

"Lucy, do you have any idea how worried I was about you? And about Edmund?"

"Are you trying to change the subject?"

"Yes and no. Really, I was extremely worried. I was so worried I even got Caspian worried!"

"He wasn't worried about us" said Lucy, shuffling her feet, "He was worried because he knew it would make you feel better"

"Well, at least he was right about finding you… I was afraid he would be wrong and we would end up…"

"End up?"

"End up… leaving… without you"

Lucy slipped her hand into Susan's and gave her a sympathetic look.

"You don't want to leave, do you?" whispered her sister, and Susan simply shook her head. Then she took a deep breath.

"No, I am not going to think about this" she said, "That was the deal. Caspian and I agreed that we would not think or speak of me leaving Narnia"

"Well you aren't doing a very good job, are you?"

"Right now I am not. But it's your fault!" she said, tickling Lucy, who shrieked, giggling.

The two sisters walked through the Narnian city, Susan showing Lucy absolutely everything and introducing her to everyone she knew. Lucy wanted desperately to see the place that Caspian had kissed Susan, but nighttime was falling, and Susan insisted that Lucy get some rest. She walked her sister back to Trufflehunter's house, where she would be staying with Susan in her room. She sighed as she left her sister, walking down to the dinning room where Caspian, Peter and Edmund were sitting around the table.

"Susan" breathed Caspian, and she sat down beside him. Edmund glared at Caspian, something Susan had expected. Out of her two brothers Edmund was definitely the protective one.

"Susan, we are planning on attacking in three days," announced Peter. Susan was shocked.

"What, just like that?"

"Yes. We met up with the other Narnians and they agree that the sooner we attack the better… we have already told our troops"

"Well… what will Lucy and I do?"

"You will come with us," said Edmund, "We will need your skill with the bow and arrow. Lucy however will stay here. It is too dangerous"

Susan nodded her agreement, and Caspian stood up and left the room, glancing at her before leaving.

"That was rude," commented Edmund, and Peter chuckled.

"I'll go see what's wrong with him" said Susan. Edmund's jaw tensed.

"Or Peter could go" he said, his teeth clenched.

"No, I think Susan should go," said Peter and Edmund glared at him.

"Way to take my side Pete" he mumbled as Susan left the room, but she didn't hear Peter's response. She saw Caspian leaning on the doorway, one leg on the frame, his arms crossed across his chest.

"It's a lovely night," said Susan quietly.

"Perfect for a walk" said Caspian pushing himself off the doorframe and holding a hand out for her to take. She took it and he intertwined his fingers with hers as they walked through the empty city, only the sound of the fauns music playing. They walked to the pasture where they had first kissed and Caspian let go of her hand.

"Susan I…"

"The music is so beautiful tonight," she said, sighing. She gave Caspian a mischievous grin.

"What?" he asked, smiling at her.

"Well aren't you going to ask me to dance?" she asked impatiently. He shuffled his feet awkwardly.

"I cannot dance" he admitted and Susan grinned.

"Neither can I! That is part of the fun," she said, putting her hands around his neck. He raised an eyebrow at her.

"You put your hands around my waist," she instructed. According to Peter, woman expert, this was the simplest way to slow dance.

"And now what do we do?"

"Now… we simply sway to the music"

"Who taught you how to dance?" asked Caspian, chuckling.

"Peter" said Susan, a fake scowl on her face, "But I should never have listened to him"

"No, this is fun," said Caspian, and Susan smiled up at him.

"Now, what did you want to tell me?"

"Oh yes. Susan, I don't think you should come"

"What?" asked Susan.

"Hear me out. It's going to be dangerous, and I don't want you to get hurt…"

"I can take care of myself"

"I know," said Caspian, "But if something happened…"

"Caspian, you need my help. You need all the help you can get!"

"We already have two entire armies…"

"I am coming with you" she said, completely serious. He sighed.

"You are so stubborn…" he said, leaning down and lightly brushing her lips with his own.

"Hmm"

"What?"

"Why is it that we only kiss here?" she asked.

"We don't. We kissed yesterday in that spare room" he said, and Susan nodded.

"True…"

"Why? Are you complaining?"

"Of course not!"

"Good" he said, leaning down to kiss her again. She received his kiss happily.

"We should head back," he mumbled. She nodded.

"We should"

He took her hand and they began walking. On their way out of the forest Susan's dress got snagged on a tree branch.

"Oh, hold on" she said, letting go of Caspian's hand and moving back to release her dress. When it was free she took a step forward, not noticing the giant tree branch that was lying right in front of her.

"Susan watch…"

Before she knew what was happening her face hit the ground and a sharp pain shot through her body.

"Ah!" she cried out. Caspian ran to help her, and she winced when he tried to help her up, his hands around her arms.

"Where does it hurt?" he asked, and she pointed to her left arm. He looked at it and bit his lip.

"I think I fell on it," she mumbled.

"I think it's broken"

"Oh you must be loving this"

"Why?"

"Because if it's broken I cannot fight"

"Oh, Susan, that is the last thought in my head right now. Hurry, we need to get you back to the city" he said, hurrying her through the city to Trufflehunter's house. When they walked in, Susan crying out in pain as her arm brushed against the doorframe, Edmund stood up, sword in hand.

"What did you do to her?"

"Ed" said Susan, "It… it wasn't Caspian, I fell and… ow" she groaned as another sharp pain shot through her body.

"Let me see it" said Trufflehunter, appearing out of nowhere. Susan yelled in pain when he held her arm out and yelled even louder as he bandaged it.

"If this is in any way your fault…" threatened Edmund, glaring at Caspian, but Peter shook his head and placed his hand on Edmund's shoulder.

"I don't believe Caspian would do this Susan" he said.

"Alright, all fixed up" said the badger, and Susan sighed.

"I can't fight, can I?"

"I'm afraid not my queen" said Trufflehunter and Susan groaned at her bad luck. She glanced up at her brothers and Caspian and noticed that while Peter and Edmund looked annoyed at the fact that she would not be able to join in the battle Caspian had a relieved look on his face, obviously completely satisfied that the woman he loved would not be in any sort of danger. Susan cursed him for being so worried about her, and cursed herself for being so useless. But there was nothing she could do. She was officially unable to fight, and she knew that no matter how hard she argued she would be keeping Lucy company during the battle.


	8. When The World Stops Turning

When the world stops turning

Susan watched as Edmund and Caspian practiced their sword fighting. If she wasn't so disgusted with herself she would have found it quite comical. After almost every swing Peter had to remind his brother that it was only a practise and that Caspian wasn't actually the enemy. It seemed that Edmund still blamed Caspian for Susan's injury.

It had been two days already and she still couldn't believe what had happened, she could not believe that she had tripped and broken her arm. It didn't seem real. She sighed and sunk her head in between her knees.

"Something wrong my queen?" asked Peter, sitting down beside her. Susan groaned.

"Obviously" she said sarcastically and Peter chuckled.

"You know…" he said after a few seconds, "Caspian was truly troubled by your injury"

"No he wasn't. He's glad that I cannot fight," she said simply.

"Why would you think that?"

"Because he asked me not to fight right before I got injured"  
"I see. Well then, of course he is glad that you cannot fight, but he was also troubled because you got injured"

"I would hope so"

"Don't be so bitter"

"I want to help Peter. I want to help; I want to give the Narnians back their land. But I can't do that if I'm sitting in an empty city with Lucy"

"I understand that you want to help, but you cannot. We attack day after tomorrow, you cannot possibly be healed by then"

"Remind me why Lucy can't just give me a drop of…"

"Because," interrupted Peter, "We will probably have many injured in this battle. We need to save it"

"That's a stupid excuse. You can always spare a drop"

"Not in this case. Susan, please, just accept the situation"

She groaned. Part of her wanted to tell Peter to shut up and leave her alone, but another part of her wanted him to stay. He was being sensible and she wasn't. She wasn't used to not being the sensible one.

"Peter!" called Caspian, and Peter stood up, taking the sword from Edmunds hand, starting to practice sword fighting with Caspian. Edmund walked over to sit by Susan, sweat running down the side of his face and dripping from his hair.

"You should get this cut," said Susan, raking her hands through his hair and then wiping the sweat on her brothers' shirt. Edmund chuckled.

"Lucy said it made me look older"

"It does. But why do you need to look older? Everybody respects you and follows your orders. You are second in command!"

"Third" mumbled Edmund.

"Third?"

"Caspian" was all her brother said, glaring at his sisters love interest. Susan sighed.

"Why don't you like him Edmund?"

"Why DO you like him?"

"He's kind, smart, easy to talk to, funny… Need I go on?"

"Alright, you've made your point. I don't know, I just don't. He makes me… uneasy. I feel like he's going to steal something from me"

Susan burst out laughing, "That's ridiculous"

"No, it isn't. Remember back in Finchley? When that guy was following us and I said I felt like he was going to steal something from us and he ended up taking all our money?"

"We had about five pounds on us Ed"

"Still. I just don't like Caspian"

"I guess you're allowed to like and dislike whomever you choose. I just wish you'd give him a chance"

"Maybe" said Edmund, "I'll think about it" the look on his face told Susan that he wasn't planning on loosing sleep over the subject. His mind was made up.

"Oh, I just thought I'd mention, this," she pointed to her bandaged arm, "Was in no way Caspian's fault. So you can stop trying to murder him"

"I'm simply getting ready for battle" shrugged Edmund.

"No, this is more than that. I'm not asking you to like him, I'm just asking you not to aim for his neck every three swings"

Edmund chuckled, and focused his sight on his brother and Caspian. Susan did the same.

She had to admit that watching them practice was breath taking. Both were so skilled with the sword that her heart skipped a beat every time one of them swung.

"I bet I could beat both of them," mumbled Edmund, and Susan scoffed.

"Ed, you're good, but you're too cocky for your own good. You could never beat Peter and Caspian if they were both up against you"

"Of course I could, I simply choose not too because I do not want to loose my brother"

"But you wouldn't mind loosing Caspian?"

Edmund didn't answer.

The siblings watched in silence as Peter and Caspian fought ferociously, and finally Caspian put a hand up, signalling respite. He handed Edmund his sword and sat down beside Susan who smiled the way she always did when he was near. Like Edmund, Caspian's face was covered in sweat, which also dripped off the ends of his hair. It was strangely attractive and Susan had to force herself to watch her brother's duel.

"Your brothers are extremely skilled," said Caspian, and Susan nodded quietly.

"But so are you. You will not look like a fool beside them"

"I wasn't worried about looking like a fool," said Caspian, a mischievous grin on his face. Susan smiled and shook her head. Caspian's grin disappeared and was replaced by a look of concern.

"How are you feeling?" he asked. Susan sighed.

"Useless, I mean, who in the world trips over a tree branch and breaks their arm?"

"You"

"That's what I mean, only me, and three days before the Narnian war of the century! I was supposed to be there claiming victory along with you and my brothers, and yet I'm going to be sitting in an empty city wondering whether or not you are even alive, and the thought of anything happening to you just kills…"

Caspian cut her off by brushing his lips against hers. She looked at him, surprised.

"I thought you needed that" he whispered, smiling crookedly.

"My brothers…"

"Already know. At least your brother Edmund does"

Susan laughed and glanced at her brothers, who were still fiercely battling each other. She decided it was safe and leaned in and kissed Caspian again. She was lost in his kiss; it was so deep, so passionate, nothing like when they kissed secretly. She could feel his strong hand placed delicately on her cheek and she put her hand on top of it. She noticed him smiling as his lips danced across hers…

"Ahem…" they heard Edmund, and they broke apart and stared up at her brothers who had stopped practising and where watching them intently. Peter had a comical grin on his face, but Edmund looked as if he could murder Caspian right there.

"Do you mind? We're trying to duel"

"We weren't doing anything to stop you"

"No, but you were distracting us, and it is terribly difficult to battle with something as distracting as a good for nothing…"

"Ed"

"What?" he asked, glaring at Peter.

"That's enough. There's no need for insults" Edmund bit his lip and turned his glare to Caspian.

"I think your rest time is up" he said bitterly, pointing his sword at his neck. Caspian nodded slightly, making sure that the blade did not cut into his throat and took the sword that Peter was holding. He stood up slowly and followed Edmund to the centre of the field where they had been practising, his opponent's blade not dropping from his neck for a second. Suddenly, Caspian attacked, practically knocking Edmunds sword out of his grasp. Edmund glared and returned the attack, fiercely, with passion. The same way Caspian had kissed Susan just seconds before. Peter sat down beside Susan, chuckling.

"You need to be more careful Susan"

"Careful?"

"Yes"

"Why?"

"Because if you pull something like that again, Edmund will have Caspian's head"

xxx

Susan had always found that Christmas Eve was the slowest day in the world. The anticipation of what was to come almost killed her, and on top of that she could never get to sleep before at least three in the morning. It was like that for her the day before Caspian, her brothers and the rest of the Narnians went to battle against the Telmarines. She spent the entire day tapping her foot, pacing, biting her nails, doing all of the things that people do when they need a distraction but simply cannot find one. That night Caspian kissed her goodnight and tucked her into her bed as if she were a child.

"Promise me something," she whispered.

"Anything" he breathed.

"Promise that you will return to me"

Caspian pursed his lips and stroked her cheek.

"I can't promise you that"

"Caspian" she said sharply.

"Yes?"

"Promise me"

"I can't…"

"Caspian!" she sat up, pain in her eyes, feeling the tears threatening to spill out. He sighed and kissed her forehead, his lips lingering on her skin much longer than they needed too.

"I promise," he whispered and Susan smiled, kissing him lightly on the cheek. She lay back down in her bed and watched as he walked out of her room, that smile that he caused always stupidly splayed across her face.

She laid that way for what seemed to be hours, thinking up the worst possible situations in her head. What if Edmund suddenly went mad halfway through the battle and decided that Caspian was a regular Telmarine that needed to be exterminated? What if the Telmarine king was actually ready for the attack? What if…

Suddenly she found herself staring through the small window in her room at the daylight outside. She yawned, guessing that she must have finally fallen asleep. She lay in her bed for a few minutes, and then realized what day it was. She jumped out of the bed quickly, not even bothering to change out of her nightgown, and ran down to the dinning room, where she saw Lucy sitting alone at the large table tapping her fingernails on the wood.

"Where is everybody?" asked Susan. Lucy looked up at her. She looked tired, as if she hadn't slept at all that night.

"They left. About an hour ago"

"No" shrieked Susan, running to the front door and throwing it open. Sure enough the city was completely deserted, except for one faun who sat watch on top of the highest tree. Susan stalked back into the dinning room and sat beside Lucy.

"Why didn't you wake me?" she practically screamed.

"Well… Caspian said you had said your goodbyes last night and… well, Peter didn't want to stall the troops any longer than they needed too so…"

"Peter…" she said, her jaw setting, "I can't believe he would just… leave! What if he never comes back! What if Edmund never comes back! What if Caspian…" she felt the tears starting to roll down her cheeks.

"Susan, they will come back," said Lucy gently placing her hand on Susan's.

"You don't know that. From what I've heard the Telmarines are very strong…"

"So are the Narnians. Remember, we have the element of surprise"

Susan sighed, wiping the tears from her face.

"I just can't believe they didn't even say goodbye…"

"Come, we should go for a walk. I don't want to be cooped up in here all day" said Lucy, standing up and offering Susan her hand. Susan stood up and grabbed her hand, and together they walked down the empty streets of Narnia.

xxx

Susan had almost expected that the Narnian army would have returned by that night, but then she remembered that it was actually quite a long trek to the Telmarine castle. She decided that she should continue going on her nightly walks, so shortly after nightfall she started to wander the city. The music that night was different in many ways. For one there was only one faun playing, at it wasn't the typical cheerful tune that the fauns normally played. This one was sad, depressing. It almost sounded helpless, as if the Narnians didn't stand a chance. She sat down under a tree, looking at the stars.

"Susan?" she heard Lucy call. Susan looked up and saw Lucy standing right over her, "I thought it was you"

"Who else would it be?"

"True. Do you mind?" she asked, pointing to the empty spot beside her sister. Susan shrugged and Lucy sat down beside her.

"Susan…" she started, but then she bit her lip, as if she wasn't sure whether or not to continue.

"Yes?" asked Susan, filled with curiosity. Lucy took a deep breath.

"What do you think happened to Aslan?" she asked. Susan looked up at the sky.

"I don't know Lucy. To tell you the truth, I was sure he would have shown up by now"

"Me too, but why do you think he hasn't?"

"Things never happen the same way twice" she answered, remembering the Doctor's words.

"Sounds like something Aslan would say…" said Lucy, and Susan chuckled, remembering that that was exactly what she had said to the Doctor.

"Maybe he's just…waiting for the right moment"

"I would guess that it would be now"

"I would agree" said Susan, "I'm not sure if we can win this battle without Aslan's help"

"Of course we can! Our armies are strong, and so are the leaders. But… having Aslan would definitely help. A lot"

"Indeed" said Susan. She fell into a deep silence, simply sitting beside her sister, watching the night sky, the music filling her. Lucy let her head drop on Susan's shoulder. Susan squealed in pain and Lucy sat up.

"Sorry! I forgot about your arm"

"How could you forget about it? It's the reason that I'm here"

"What?" asked Lucy, looking confused. Susan raised an eyebrow.

"I… I was supposed to go with them, to fight. I was supposed to lead the archers, but I got injured and…"

"They were going to leave me alone" mumbled Lucy, "I cannot believe they were planning on leaving me alone, what did they think I was going to do all this time?" she screamed the last bit, and the music stopped. The faun had obviously been alarmed by Lucy's sudden outburst.

"Lucy…"

"I cannot believe this! I cannot believe they were planning on taking you too. Am I really that useless?"

"No, that title belongs to me"

"Obviously not if they wanted you to lead the archers!"

"Come on Lucy, you knew you weren't going to come… you have to tend to the injured soldiers after… you wouldn't be much help if you got injured yourself"

Lucy exhaled sharply.

"Lu, don't be mad at Peter and Edmund. What if they don't come back?"

Suddenly the tears that Lucy seemed to have been holding back for a long time came trickling to the surface.

"I know," she said, grabbing a fistful of grass as the music started up again, "I know I just… I can't think of loosing anybody else"

"Who have you lost?"

"Mr. Tumnus. The beavers. Everybody that used to reside in Narnia when we were kings and queens!"

Susan let what her sister had just said sink in. She hadn't even thought about that. All of their old friends were gone… How could she have forgotten about Mr. Tumnus? Of course he had been more Lucy's friend than hers, but she had risked a lot to save him from the White Witch…

"I… Lucy, I'm sorry…"

"It's not your fault" But as she said those words Susan felt as if it were here fault. She had been the one to mention her brothers possible disappearance forever…

"I wonder… I wonder if you die here… where do you go?"

"You probably go to be with Aslan," said Susan bitterly. Lucy looked like she was thinking for a few seconds, and then she wiped the tears from her face.

"You really think he's gone? I mean, for good?"

"I never said that. I don't believe he can be gone" clarified Susan.

"But if you die, and you go to be with Aslan…"

"It's just a theory Lu"

"It seems like a pretty believable theory"

"Well, I don't know. To tell you the truth I don't even know whether you can actually truly die in Narnia… being from England"

Lucy sat in silence for a while, staring at the grass, tears still falling from her eyes.

"It's getting late" she said suddenly, standing up, "I'm going to bed"

Susan watched as her sister walked away slowly, and began to ponder on her sisters' question, hoping that neither her brothers nor Caspian would be finding out anytime soon.

xxx

The days passed slowly. Lucy and Susan had stopped talking, coming to a silent agreement that if they did talk all they would be able to talk about was death and dying and whether or not the battle had ended, or if had even started.

Susan found herself wishing for Caspian to be beside her every second of the day, no matter where she was. She could remember the first time they met; how he had simply thought she was a strangely dressed peasant. She wondered if he would have fallen in love with her had he never known she was a queen. Maybe, maybe not. She might never get to ask him.

Susan had stopped counting the days since the army had left after the second day of them being gone, figuring that it would just make the days seem longer, and wasn't truly aware if a month had passed or if it had only been a week. It felt as if it had been years. What she did know was that her arm was healing, slowly but surely.

One day, while Susan was walking alone through the empty streets, she heard someone running behind her, and turned, expecting to see Lucy. Instead she saw the guard faun, running towards her, a smile on his face. It was as if the world stopped turning when he yelled 'The armies have returned'. Susan didn't waste any time, running towards the entrance to the city. The faun continued running into the city, probably looking for Lucy.

The first person she saw was Peter who led the troops on horse. His helmet was gone and his armour was shredded. He had a huge gash on his cheek that had the appearance of having scabbed over and reopened. But despite his ghastly appearance he had a victorious smile on his face. He got off his horse and greeted Susan in a bone-crushing hug.

"I'm so happy to see you," she wept. Peter nodded his agreement, "Where is Edmund?"

Peter bit his lip and signalled towards the rest of the army. Susan noticed how much smaller it was. Not even a quarter of the city had returned, and there had been two cities fighting. She gave Peter a worried look and he shook his head reassuringly. She ran towards the army, searching earnestly for Edmund, but she couldn't find him. She turned back to Peter.

"Where's Ed? And Caspian?"

"Ed is in the Telmarine city, taking care of the severely injured"

"We won," she said breathlessly. It wasn't a question, it was a statement.

"Yes, we won. We have come to bring you and Lucy back to the castle"

"And where is Caspian?"

"Caspian is with Aslan," said Peter as he received Lucy in the same bone-crushing hug that he had given Susan. Susan thought of her conversation with Lucy that one night (how long ago had that been?), about how maybe when somebody died in Narnia, they went to be with Aslan. Peter turned to her as soon as she let out a muffled cry, her hand clamped over her mouth, tears streaking down her face. Peter put a protective arm around Susan.

"Come, we will return to the city. There is someone there who can explain the situation much better then I can"

Reluctantly Susan climbed onto a horse and she followed her brother and the small entourage that had accompanied him. She noticed the guard faun riding with Lucy, and she wondered if they had formed some sort of friendship while the sisters weren't talking. But at that moment she couldn't feel happy for her sister. She couldn't feel happy for anybody. She felt empty.

A/N cliffie! Sorry if you hate those! I'm working on the next chapter already and should have it up by tomorrow or Sunday…


	9. Wonderful Journey

**Wonderful Journey**

Susan was surprised when they reached the Telmarine city the same day that they had set off. Or had they? She wasn't sure. She hadn't really been paying any attention as to where they were going, and she might have easily ridden all night without noticing that the sun was gone. As soon as they arrived Lucy dismounted her horse and ran towards the castle, taking the small phial out of its case as she ran. Susan slowly dismounted the horse and walked it to the stables.

She started wandering the grounds of the castle, looking for some sign of hope, something that could change the situation she was currently. She felt dead, and found herself wishing that they would be sent back to England as soon as possible.

"Do you really wish that?" she asked a deep voice behind her. She turned and found herself staring into the eyes of the largest lion she had ever seen. Her voice stuck in her throat and all she was able to make were indistinct noises. Finally she found her voice.

"Aslan!" she exclaimed. The lion chuckled.

"I see that your memory is good… now about your faith…"

"My faith?"

"That Caspian might still be alive"

"Well, I thought… Peter said…"

"That Caspian was with Aslan. And here I am"

"So where is Caspian?"

"Susan!" she heard Caspian's voice and she turned, and saw him running towards her. She expected him to hug her quickly seeing as Aslan was standing right in front of them, staring at them, but as soon as he reached her he grabbed her face and pulled her in for a passionate kiss. Susan felt lost in the kiss, feeling all the warmth return to her body. Caspian wasn't dead… he had literally been with Aslan… that meant…

"PETER!" she screamed, feeling tears running down her cheeks again. Her brother appeared, a smirk on his face as if he were proud of himself.

"Yes?" he asked, walking towards her. Before he could get too close she slapped him across the face. He stumbled backward and she heard Aslan chuckle.

"Why in the world didn't you tell me that Caspian was alive?" she screamed, "Do you know what I've been through in the past… how long has it been?"

"About 24 hours" said Aslan knowingly.

"The past 24 hours! Would it really have killed you to mention that Caspian was ALIVE and with Aslan?"

"I wanted it to be a surprise" clarified Peter and Susan felt the rage inside her building.

"Oh, so you wanted it to be a surprise huh? Well, SURPRISE!" she screamed and she started to chase him around the grounds. She barely noticed that Aslan was practically rolling on the ground and Caspian was biting his lip, trying not to laugh. Finally Caspian caught her by the waist and she stopped.

"You were really worried about me, huh?" he asked, smiling at her crookedly. She started crying again.

"You have no idea"

He wiped her tears away with his thumbs and kissed her lightly.

"I'm okay" he whispered and she wrapped her arms around him.

"Oi, love birds!" she heard Edmunds unmistakable voice. She saw him, and couldn't believe her eyes. If he had looked older with the new haircut he looked even older in his post-battle state. It was hard for her to believe that he was only thirteen, he looked about sixteen.

"Ed!" she screamed running towards her brother, hugging him.

"See? That's more like it," he said, chuckling as he patted her hair.

She pulled apart, smiling.

"Where are the others? Trumpkin, Trufflehunter, Nikabrik… Reepicheep!"

"They are being tended to by Lucy," said Aslan calmly.

"When did you return?" asked Susan. Aslan smiled.

"Why don't you come for a walk with me, my queen?" he asked. Susan nodded and then glanced at her brothers and Caspian who seemed to be nudging her towards the giant lion. She sighed and followed him towards the castle gardens.

xxx

"Are you glad to be back in Narnia my queen?" asked Aslan as they walked through the gardens. Susan smiled.

"Quite"

"And might this happiness have something to do with a certain Prince Caspian?"

Susan felt herself blush. She looked at the ground.

"Well, he is a very good friend…"

"And a very good kisser?"

She was sure her face was extremely red by now. She bit her lip.

"I…I guess…"

"And would I be correct to suspect that that was not your first kiss with the young prince?"

"You would," she whispered.

"Susan… I want you to know something. I do not disapprove. This is not why I have asked to talk to you"

"Then why have you?" she asked, looking up into the great lions eyes.

"Well, it came to my attention that you seemed to think that Caspian was dead"

"That was because of lack of communication on Peters part" she sad bitterly, still wanting to rip her brother's head off.

"How did that feel?"

Susan was caught off guard by the question. She raised an eyebrow questioningly.

"Sorry?"

"How did it feel to think that Caspian was dead?"

She thought for a second and then took a deep breath.

"I don't think I can explain it with words"

"Try"

"Um… okay…" she thought again, "I felt as if I had nothing to live for anymore…"

"I was afraid of that," said Aslan.

"Aslan" began Susan, biting her lip, "Is there anyway that I can stay in Narnia?"

Aslan looked away from her, and Susan looked at the ground. She already knew the answer, and she wished she hadn't asked. Knowing there was no way she could stay was one thing, but hearing Aslan say it out loud would show that it was definitely impossible.

Finally Aslan turned to look at the girl with a faint smile on his lips.

"Perhaps" was all he said. Susan didn't know what to do. Part of her felt like screaming, but another part of her didn't want to get her hopes up.

"If there is, would you let me know?"

"Of course my queen" said Aslan, and Susan smiled.

"Thank you"

"Susan"

"Yes?"

"Do you regret coming back to Narnia?"

"You make it sound as if I choose to come back" she said, laughing.

"Well, if you knew what was going to happen and you had the choice to return, would you?"

"Yes. It's been a wonderful journey. I don't regret a single part of it," she said. She had not even thought about it, but after saying it out loud she knew it was true.

"I am glad. Now I must leave you. I believe there are several somebody's waiting to speak to you inside the castle"

Susan nodded, quickly hugged the lion and made her way to the main entrance of the castle.

xxx

Susan had been glad to see that Reepicheep, Trumpkin and Trufflehunter were alright, but sadly Lucy had been to late to save Nikabrik who had been fatally wounded during the battle. After conversing with her Narnian friends for a few minutes Susan made her way out of the castle to find a quite place where she could think.

She somehow found herself sitting under an apple tree in a far corner of the castle's gardens, where only minutes ago she had been talking to Aslan.

'Perhaps'

What did that mean? Were her, Peter, Edmund and Lucy meant to stay in Narnia? Or did he know that she didn't truly want him to tell her that she had to go back to England? No, he had said perhaps there was a way for her to stay… and if he were absolutely certain there wasn't he would not have said perhaps, he would have told her the truth.

"May I join you?" she heard her brother Edmund's voice and she nodded. She felt someone sitting beside her and she turned to look at her brother. He smiled slightly and she leaned on his shoulder.

"You know," said Edmund, sounding as if he were choosing his words carefully, "They are crowning Caspian tomorrow"

"Are they?" asked Susan.

"Yes. Soon he will be a king of Narnia"

"Three kings? How is that possible!" she joked.

"I know, it's almost as bad as having two kings," said Edmund, rolling his eyes. Both siblings chuckled, remembering how many times they had joked and argued about the idea of Narnia having more than one king while they reigned.

"Are you going to attend the ceremony?" she asked. Edmund sighed.

"I have to. The Narnians want their kings of old along with Aslan to crown him"

"Do you not want him to be king?"

Edmund shook his head.

"He will be a brave and kind king. A good leader"

"It is strange to hear you speaking kind words about Caspian"

"Things have changed. I've learnt to respect him during the battle"

"Was it a hard battle?" she asked cautiously.

"You've no idea. The Telmarines were an extremely skilled army, and there were many of them. But we had the element of surprise… They never saw it coming"

"I'm glad we won," she mumbled, "Although I wish I could have been a tad less useless"

"You actually played an important part in our victory"

"How so?"

"Caspian refused to die. He was wounded several times, fatally once, but somehow he kept coming. It was him that killed Miraz at the end. And do you know why he would not die?"

"Because he promised," breathed Susan. Edmund nodded.

"I do not know how he was able to continue battling"

"He is strong"

"Indeed. But it seemed almost unnatural how he could continue fighting. Like I said, he was fatally wounded"

"Aslan" said Susan.

"Of course! I had forgotten how much help he was. We could not have won without him"

"Obviously" said Susan, smiling.

"Susan, how long do you expect we will be in Narnia?"

"I do not know. I only hope"

"And what do you hope?"

"I hope that we are here longer than last time"

"But last time we were here for at least twenty years!"

"I know"

"You don't want to leave do you?" asked Edmund. Susan shook her head, "Neither does Peter" he commented and Susan chuckled.

"Peter was devastated when we were sent back the first time. I think being sent back again would be the end of him. He belongs in Narnia"

"But do you?"

Susan thought for a few seconds, and then nodded, smiling.

"Yes, I believe I do"

"Then I hope we may stay for as long as possible," said Edmund, putting an arm around his sister.

A/N Sorry it took so long to get this chapter up, and sorry it's so short ): Hopefully next chapter will be easier to write!


	10. Nothing's Gonna Tear Us Apart

**Nothing's Gonna Tear Us Apart**

Susan groaned loudly as she picked up a rock and threw it as far as she could. Five years. Five years she had been in Narnia, and five years Aslan had kept her in suspense. For five whole years she had lived in fear of getting sucked back to England, and for five years she had rejected Caspian's attempts to take their relationship to the next level.

Marriage.

The thought scared Susan more than she cared to admit, and not only because she feared beginning a family and suddenly not being in Narnia. She wasn't exactly sure what it was, but something always stopped her from agreeing to marry Narnia's king.

"Susan?" called Lucy. Susan turned to look at her sister. Over the years Lucy had grown into a beautiful woman, and although according to most Susan was the more beautiful of the two, she had to disagree. She was sure that the dozen men that had asked for Lucy's hand in marriage agreed with her.

"Yes?" asked Susan, her voice cracking. She bit her lip, not wanting to cry, but the tears seemed to spill out anyway. Her sister ran towards her and threw her arms around her sister.

"What's wrong?" she whispered. Susan sniffed.

"It's just… it's everything! We've been here for five years and Aslan still hasn't told me if it's possible for me to stay in Narnia forever, and if it isn't its just going to be harder to leave and then on top of that there's the whole marriage thing and it's just…"

"Marriage thing?" asked Lucy, pulling away from her sister. Susan bit her lip. She had forgotten that she hadn't told Lucy about Caspian's many proposals.

"Er… well Caspian may have asked me to marry him once or twice…"

"Really? That's… wonderful," said Lucy, but she looked alarmed when she saw Susan grow more pained.

"It is, but I cannot marry him! I may not be in Narnia tomorrow…"

"It's been five years Susan"

"And it was more last time" said Susan, and Lucy's shoulders sagged at the reminder.

"You're right… I just guess that I'm getting too used to being here. I do miss England though"

"Lu, if given the choice, would you stay in Narnia?"

"Forever?"

"Forever"

"Do you want me to answer that one hundred percent truthfully?"

"Yes"

"No"

"No you won't answer truthfully?"

"No, no I wouldn't stay in Narnia forever"

Susan thought about what her sister had just said and bit her lip.

"And Edmund?" she asked.

"I do not think he would stay either," answered Lucy honestly.

Suddenly, another worry had been added to Susan's list.

xxx

The next morning Susan watched from the balcony that came off her room as Caspian and Edmund walked together through the castle gardens. Their relationship had come so far… she often thought that Edmund was probably closer to Caspian now than Peter was. She smiled when Caspian noticed her and waved up at her. He put a hand up and started running. Even from the distance she could see Edmund's eyes rolling.

Minutes later Caspian came running into her room. He paused to catch his breath in the doorway and Susan smirked, realizing that she was still only wearing her pyjamas.

"You're sweating," she said laughing. Caspian laughed and walked towards her, crashing his lips on hers. He led her onto the balcony and before she knew it she was pinned up against the wall outside her room. For the first time in a long time his hands roamed her sides and she smiled against his mouth. Caspian pulled away from her, a serious look on his face.

"Marry me"

Susan cupped his face in her hands and brought it towards hers. His long black hair caressed her cheeks and she felt the familiar tingle run down her spine.

"Not yet" she whispered. He groaned but before he could leave she kissed him again.

"Oi!" called Edmund from the garden. Susan looked over Caspian's shoulder as Caspian kissed her neck, "Get a room!"

"Get a life" called back Susan, joking. Edmund scoffed loudly.

"Susan!" called another voice. She noticed that Peter was now standing beside Edmund. She raised an eyebrow.

"What?" she groaned, cursing her brothers.

"Aslan wants to talk to us"

Caspian pulled away from her.

"Well, off you go" he said, stepping aside.

"Caspian, you come too" called Peter before him and Edmund walked away. Susan sighed and grabbed Caspian's hand, walking towards the exit of her room.

"Wait!" she suddenly screamed, "I can't go like this" she motioned to her long white pyjamas. Caspian smirked.

"I hadn't noticed you weren't dressed. I'll wait for you outside" he kissed her on the forehead and left the room, closing the door behind him. She smiled as she pulled her favourite dress on. It took her several minutes to finish tying the dress in the back and to comb her hair. Finally she stepped outside where Caspian was patiently waiting for her.

"Ready?"

"I've been ready for a long time," she said, barely breathing. She knew what Aslan was going to tell them. And she wasn't sure if she was ready to hear it.

xxx

Susan felt as if she hadn't seen Aslan for ages when she walked into the throne room and saw him standing talking to her brothers. Both were listening intently to what he had to say, something that worried Susan. Lucy was still nowhere to be seen.

"Ah, Susan, Caspian" acknowledged the magnificent lion. Both bowed and only stood when Aslan beckoned them too.

"My Susan, you have gotten more beautiful"

"So Caspian has noticed," mumbled Edmund. Susan blushed, only then thinking of how it must have looked to people passing by to see their king and one of their queens simply necking it while the queen was still only wearing her nightgown. Peter elbowed Edmund.

"You wished to speak with us?"

"Yes, but with all of you" said Aslan, smiling, "And it seems you are not all yet here, so why don't we simply enjoy each others presence until queen Lucy arrives?"

Edmund instantly went to stand between Susan and Caspian, breaking their hands apart. Susan rolled her eyes.

"Honestly Ed, how long is this going to go on? You get on fine with Caspian!"

"Not when he's kissing my sister" he said, his teeth clenched. Susan laughed and threw her arms around Edmund.

"You're so cute Ed"

"I am NOT cute," he said indignantly. Although Susan had to agree, she would never tell him. Edmund had surpassed cute a long time ago, and now was simply downright handsome, tall and strong. She was aware that he had caught the eye of several of the girls in the court.

"You saying that only makes you cuter" she teased, pinching his cheek. Edmund swatted her away as Caspian laughed.

"Oh, Susan, leave him alone" said Peter, although he was smiling as well. Susan had to admit that it was strange to see Peter smiling. For the past year and a half he had been solemn, his normally bright blue eyes dull. When she had asked him about it he had simply replied that he didn't know what she was talking about. But for some reason the colour had returned to his eyes, and his smile was back on his face. She hadn't realized how much she had missed that smile until then.

"Sorry Edmund" said Susan, although she didn't really mean it. A shriek suddenly filled the hall.

"Pete! You're smiling!" cried out Lucy. She ran towards her brother, who picked her up and swung her around in his arms.

"Yes, well I have just heard some good news" he said, lowering to the ground.

"Oh have you?" she asked, "And what might that good news be?"

"I… I don't think it's really my good news to share" said Peter, glancing at Aslan, who nodded.

"Now that we are all here, there is something very important that I need to address. As Peter said, I have some good news, but it might not exactly be good news to all of you"

Susan swallowed her spit. She wasn't ready to hear this. She noticed Caspian raise an eyebrow at Aslan who simply nodded slightly, so slightly that if she hadn't been watching she wouldn't have noticed. Caspian took something out of his pocket, but Susan didn't see what it was. She looked back at Aslan.

"Young Pevensie's… the time has come for you to return to your true home"

Susan held her breath. Aslan noticed this and smiled.

"However… you do not all need to return" he turned to Peter and Susan, a glimmer in his eyes. Peter smiled and Susan covered her mouth with her hands.

"So… Ed and I will return, but Peter and Susan will stay?" asked Lucy, turning to her siblings, tears already running down her cheeks.

"Only if they so choose," said Aslan, watching them carefully.

Susan couldn't find any words to describe how she was feeling. The only way she felt she could portray her feelings was to grasp Caspian's hand. He squeezed her hand, smiling down at her. She felt Peter's hand wrap around her other hand, and he nodded at Aslan.

"Alright. I will give you time to say your goodbyes" he said, leaving the Pevensie's and Caspian alone. Lucy instantly ran to Susan and hugged her.

"Oh, Susan, how? How am I going to live in England without you? How will mum react? What will we say?"  
Susan patted her sister's hair, crying as well. She had never guessed that to stay with Caspian she might never be able to see Edmund and Lucy again. It wasn't fair to make her choose, but she knew who she couldn't live without.

"I'm going to miss you so much" she whispered into her sister's hair. Lucy tightened her grip around Susan's waist. Finally she let go, wiping tears from her eyes.

"Why are you crying?" she asked, laughing. Susan smiled.

"Because I might never see you and Edmund ever again! I'm not completely heartless"

"No, if you were you would have left Caspian," said Lucy, smiling. Susan was glad to see that her sister understood, even if it didn't make her feel much better. She turned to Edmund as Lucy made her way to Peter.

"I was right," said Edmund as he wrapped his strong arms around Susan. Susan gave him a confused look when they pulled away.

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"I told you I had the feeling Caspian would steal something from me. And he did. He stole my sister" he hugged her again, and Susan noticed that even he was crying. She bit her lip, crying into his chest. Finally she let him go.

"I'm really going to miss you Ed" she said. Edmund smiled slightly.

"Not as much as I'll miss you" then he glanced at Caspian and whispered in Susan's ear, "Here, just in case he ever hurts you," Susan noticed him handing her a small package. She looked confused, but understood when she saw her own horn in her hand.

"Ed, where…"

"I know Caspian lost it during the battle… I've been searching for it. I want you to have it. Make sure you call us at least once more" he kissed her forehead. Susan looked down at the horn, but noticed something else. She gasped, but didn't say anything. Edmund walked over to Caspian to say goodbye. Susan stood beside Peter, who was also crying.

"You knew" she said, "Aslan told you we would be able to stay"

"Yes, but he forgot to mention that Edmund and Lucy wouldn't" he stated bitterly, "But we will see them again" he said, smiling at the object in Susan's hands, "I'm sure of that"

His eyes widened for a second and he looked into Susan's eyes. He had obviously seen the object that had also caught her attention. She shrugged, but nodded. Peter hugged her, and she heard Lucy and Edmund chuckling.

"You'd think you weren't going to see each other ever again," said Edmund. Susan dried her eyes with her thumb and smiled at her brother. She couldn't believe they were being separated. She hugged Edmund and Lucy again.

"I will miss you guys more than you can even imagine," she said as Aslan walked back into the room.

"Are you ready?" he asked. Lucy and Edmund held hands and nodded. Aslan took a deep breath and let it out on the two youngest Pevensie's and suddenly they were gone. Susan clasped Caspian's hand tightly.

"Are they alright?" asked Peter and Aslan nodded. Then he turned to Susan.

"You will see them again my queen"

Susan could hear from the way he said the words that it wasn't a statement. It was a promise.

xxx

Susan, Caspian and Peter walked back towards the castle, already missing their siblings but strangely at peace with their decision.

"Um, Peter" said Susan when they reached the courtyard. Peter turned to look at her and she nudged him away with her head. Peter understood, obviously remembering what Susan had told him earlier and quickly excused himself, saying something about a long awaited trip to the toilet. When he was gone, Susan took a deep breath.

"You know… Edmund gave me a very interesting gift today" she said, trying to hide the excitement that was slowly building inside of her. Caspian rested his arms on her shoulders and gave her a crooked smile.

"Did he?"

"He found my horn," she said, putting the horn up to Caspian's face. He backed up a bit and then took it from her, examining it.

"Where…"

"No idea. I was going to ask him but I didn't have enough time" she said, shrugging and biting her lip, not wanting to start crying again.

"Wow. I didn't think I'd ever see this again" he said, handing the horn back to her, "I owe it so much"

"Oh do you?"

"Yes, I do, and I never got to thank it!"

"And why might you owe it?" she asked playfully. Caspian rested his arms on her shoulders again, smirking.

"Well, if it wasn't for that horn I would have never met three of my best friends" he said, the smirk never leaving his face.

"Only three?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah, Peter, Edmund and Lucy" he said, "But it also brought me to a very important in my life right now"

"Who, your fiancée?" she asked, smiling. Caspian's eyes lit up and he picked her up and swung her around as Peter had done to Lucy what felt like hours ago. He pressed his lips to hers and she responded, kissing him back passionately.

"You saw?" Susan nodded.

"When…" she began, but he cut her off, knowing what she was going to ask.

"When you held my hand before, in front of Aslan" he said, smirking, "I thought you would notice"

"I didn't" she admitted, "I only saw it after Edmund gave me the horn"

"And you agree?" he asked. And Susan nodded.

"Yes" she said, the excitement obvious in her voice. She looked down at her finger where a glistening diamond ring was placed delicately. She bit her lip, "It really is beautiful"

"I was waiting for this moment… Aslan told me about, well about Ed and Lucy not being able to stay, and I thought you might need a little pick me up after"

Susan slapped his shoulder playfully, "You knew? And you didn't tell me?"

He just smiled at her crookedly and kissed her again. Susan sighed and melted into the kiss, not regretting for one second her choice to stay in Narnia.


	11. Epilogue: Now And Forever

**Epilogue**

**Now and Forever**

"Caspian!" called Susan to her eldest son. The eighteen year old turned to his mother, giving her the exact same crooked smile that his father had.

"Yeah?"

"What in the world do you think you're doing?" she asked, trying not to smile.

"I don't know what you're talking about" he said, shrugging, still smiling. Susan put her hands on her hips.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about. Get your sister out of that headlock right now!"

Caspian laughed and let go of his younger sister, a thirteen year old that looked exactly the same as her namesake, Lucy. She kicked him in the shins and Susan noticed that she was covered in flour.

"What in the world…" she started, but Caspian and Lucy were already gone.

"It's a long story," said her third child, a sixteen year old boy that looked like he could be Peter in his younger years.

"Oh, I have time" assured Susan and Edmund laughed.

"Maybe some other time. Arabelle is waiting for me," he said, winking.

"Alright, well, don't do anything to her!" said his mother, squeezing his elbow. Edmund rolled his eyes.

"Mum! We're friends, get it? FRIENDS!"

"Mhmm, sure, that's what they all say" said Susan winking. Edmund groaned and walked away. Susan watched him leave.

"You shouldn't be so hard on him," said her oldest son, appearing behind her.

"Don't you think that being sympathetic over him is going to get you out of trouble! Why did you cover your sister in flour?"

"Because she's as cute as a cupcake!"

"Yes, that makes sense. Alright, your punishment is… that Edmund will be king, and not you"

"You can't do that!" shrieked Caspian. Susan laughed and her son caught on that she was kidding. He bumped her playfully, "That wasn't funny"

"It was! Alright, but seriously, no horse ridding for a week"

"What!"

"Next time you're going to do something stupid, think about it first!"

"You always say that"

"You never listen," she said, shrugging and walking away. She walked into her bedroom and out onto the balcony sighing. She saw Lucy playing with one of the dogs that they had living around the palace, the dog yelling instructions to some game that Susan had never heard of. She remembered when she had seen Caspian and Edmund down there twenty years ago, chatting away. Tears came to her eyes at the memory of her brother.

"I can't believe you walked right by me" whispered her husband's voice as he wrapped his arms around her waist. She rested her head on his strong chest and sighed.

"Do you remember twenty years ago? Just before Aslan came to talk to us? I was watching you and Edmund"

"And then I came up here and sucked your face" joked Caspian, kissing her one the cheek. Susan laughed.

"Yes, I don't think Ed was very happy about that" she said and Caspian laughed with her.

"I really miss them," said Caspian. Susan nodded

"As do I"

Something caught her attention. The dog that had been playing with her daughter had an object in his mouth and was handing it to her thirteen year old. Her eyes widened when she realized it was her horn. How had he gotten that? Her daughter looked up at her, a mischievous glint in her eyes and then brought it to her lips. Susan gasped, running down to where her daughter was. Too late, the horns sound was probably heard all the way into the Narnians old city. She didn't stop though, running to her daughter. Her daughter handed her the horn.

"Nothing happened" she said, shrugging. Susan snatched the horn from her hands. She had been afraid for so many years that she would call on her brother and sister and they wouldn't come because they were dead or had forgotten about Narnia. Aslan had said it could happen. She looked down at her daughter.

"Do you know what this is supposed to do?" she asked.

"Well, the Doctor told us that it summons the kings and queens of old," said her daughter innocently.

"And who are the kings and queens of old Lucy?"

"You and uncle Peter, right?"

Susan sighed. How many times had she told her children that she had two more siblings? More than she could count… it just didn't stick in their heads.

She walked away from her daughter, thinking about what she had just done. That horn was supposed to summon Edmund and Lucy, so where were they? She sat down under a tree and buried her head in her hands.

Her previous question was answered when a deep voice that could only be her younger brothers called "Um… could you help us down?"

Susan looked up into the tree, and sitting there, trapped between the branches, were King Edmund the Just and Queen Lucy the Valiant.

_**A/N The End! Yay! Sorry it took so long to get this last part up, it was really hard to write (: Hope you enjoyed the story and weren't too disappointed with the ending! Thank you soooo much to those who reviewed and subscribed to the story alerts, it really means a lot to me (: **_


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